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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Homework

작성자: 김*우
2024-03-06 1690

회원님의 영작문

Hi, T.Donna.
I could spend all of my time to be happy today.
Everything was perfect.
I woke up with a good emotion.
After the class, I rode a car to take my kids to their school; their vacation was finished.
And then, my wife and I went to a cinema and watched a movie "Digging the grave".
In my opinion, it was not such a good movie because there were only little probability and I saw many awkward transition all over the movie, nevertheless, we were satisfied somewhat.
That's because we could spend our time without kids after a long time.
Our lunch also was satisfying.
After lunch, we went to the school to take our kids to home.
I could meet a friend of Irene, it was meaningful, I guess.
In the guitar class, the teacher praised me about improvement and diligence.
My family and I ate a grilled pork for dinner, and it tasted really good.
After dinner, my kids and my wife played Nintendo game.
I felt large amount of happiness while watching them.
MJ didn't bother me as I expected.
See you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Dr. Kim!

By this time, your life had stabilized. Everything is running smoothly and peacefully. It is true that life is full of adversities and stress however, it is also a choice to be happy and contented. In short, the toxicity level that we allow in our lives is the decision we make all the time.

Anyway, I learned much about the movie 'Digging the Grave' from you today. Since we grew up watching excellent quality movie plots, it is easy to spot a good movie from the average ones. Thank you for sharing the synopsis as well as your critical review of the logical flow of the story.

I wish you more days as yesterday and even happier ones! Since you quit dealing with negativity, your life has now more rooms for positive energies and connections. Whatever lies ahead including success in your clinic, you truly deserve it.

Please study the underlined grammar suggestions and make sure to incorporate them on your next compositions. Well done!

See you!

-T. Donna~

Hi, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

I could spend all of my time to be happy today.
>> Correct!

Everything was perfect.
>> Correct!

I woke up with a good emotion.
>> Correct!

After the class, I rode a car to take my kids to their school; their vacation was finished.
>> Correct! 

And then, my wife and I went to a cinema and watched a movie "Digging the grave".
>> Correct
Or: "Digging the Grave"

In my opinion, it was not such a good movie because there were only little probability and I saw many awkward transition all over the movie, nevertheless, we were satisfied somewhat.
>> In my opinion, it was not such a good movie because there were only a little probability and I saw many awkward transitions all over the movie, nevertheless, we were satisfied somewhat. Very good sentence!

That's because we could spend our time without kids after a long time.
>> That's because we could spend our time without  the kids after a long time.

Our lunch also was satisfying.
>> Correct!
Or:  Our lunch was also satisfying.

After lunch, we went to the school to take our kids to home.
>>After lunch, we went to the school to take our kids home.

I could meet a friend of Irene, it was meaningful, I guess.
>> Correct!
Or: I met a friend of Irene and I guess it was meaningful.

In the guitar class, the teacher praised me about improvement and diligence.
>> In the guitar class, the teacher praised me for my improvement and diligence.

My family and I ate a grilled pork for dinner, and it tasted really good.
>> My family and I ate grilled pork for dinner, and it tasted really good.

After dinner, my kids and my wife played Nintendo game.
>> After dinner, my kids and my wife played a Nintendo game.

I felt large amount of happiness while watching them.
>> I felt a huge amount of happiness while watching them.

MJ didn't bother me as I expected.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
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