¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2024-03-06 880

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi, T.Donna.
I could spend all of my time to be happy today.
Everything was perfect.
I woke up with a good emotion.
After the class, I rode a car to take my kids to their school; their vacation was finished.
And then, my wife and I went to a cinema and watched a movie "Digging the grave".
In my opinion, it was not such a good movie because there were only little probability and I saw many awkward transition all over the movie, nevertheless, we were satisfied somewhat.
That's because we could spend our time without kids after a long time.
Our lunch also was satisfying.
After lunch, we went to the school to take our kids to home.
I could meet a friend of Irene, it was meaningful, I guess.
In the guitar class, the teacher praised me about improvement and diligence.
My family and I ate a grilled pork for dinner, and it tasted really good.
After dinner, my kids and my wife played Nintendo game.
I felt large amount of happiness while watching them.
MJ didn't bother me as I expected.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Dr. Kim!

By this time, your life had stabilized. Everything is running smoothly and peacefully. It is true that life is full of adversities and stress however, it is also a choice to be happy and contented. In short, the toxicity level that we allow in our lives is the decision we make all the time.

Anyway, I learned much about the movie 'Digging the Grave' from you today. Since we grew up watching excellent quality movie plots, it is easy to spot a good movie from the average ones. Thank you for sharing the synopsis as well as your critical review of the logical flow of the story.

I wish you more days as yesterday and even happier ones! Since you quit dealing with negativity, your life has now more rooms for positive energies and connections. Whatever lies ahead including success in your clinic, you truly deserve it.

Please study the underlined grammar suggestions and make sure to incorporate them on your next compositions. Well done!

See you!

-T. Donna~

Hi, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

I could spend all of my time to be happy today.
>> Correct!

Everything was perfect.
>> Correct!

I woke up with a good emotion.
>> Correct!

After the class, I rode a car to take my kids to their school; their vacation was finished.
>> Correct! 

And then, my wife and I went to a cinema and watched a movie "Digging the grave".
>> Correct
Or: "Digging the Grave"

In my opinion, it was not such a good movie because there were only little probability and I saw many awkward transition all over the movie, nevertheless, we were satisfied somewhat.
>> In my opinion, it was not such a good movie because there were only a little probability and I saw many awkward transitions all over the movie, nevertheless, we were satisfied somewhat. Very good sentence!

That's because we could spend our time without kids after a long time.
>> That's because we could spend our time without  the kids after a long time.

Our lunch also was satisfying.
>> Correct!
Or:  Our lunch was also satisfying.

After lunch, we went to the school to take our kids to home.
>>After lunch, we went to the school to take our kids home.

I could meet a friend of Irene, it was meaningful, I guess.
>> Correct!
Or: I met a friend of Irene and I guess it was meaningful.

In the guitar class, the teacher praised me about improvement and diligence.
>> In the guitar class, the teacher praised me for my improvement and diligence.

My family and I ate a grilled pork for dinner, and it tasted really good.
>> My family and I ate grilled pork for dinner, and it tasted really good.

After dinner, my kids and my wife played Nintendo game.
>> After dinner, my kids and my wife played a Nintendo game.

I felt large amount of happiness while watching them.
>> I felt a huge amount of happiness while watching them.

MJ didn't bother me as I expected.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133522 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 0
133521 Survey ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 1
133520 Letter ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 1
133519 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 0
133518 What are the things you want to achieve before the end of this... ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 1495
133517 Homework 12/27 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 1
133516 homework ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 1
133515 The Meaning of \"Success\" in Modern Society ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 3
133514 Old people\'s name with culture and values °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1
133513 What does a vacation make you feel? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 312
133512 Major holidays ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 311
133511 homework 12.28 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 378
133510 Would you rather visit every country or fly to outer space? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 701
133509 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is it important... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 3
133508 What subject would you like to be most knowledgeable about? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 1
133507 Would you like to be a celebrity? What do you think are the... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 0
133506 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 222
133505 homework ³ë*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 249
133504 What country would you like to visit? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 322
133503 homework ±è*´ã ¿Ï·á 2023-12-28 512

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04