¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2024-03-05 1764

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think money is important. But There isn't only important thing to buy something.
Sometimes, my father tell me that "If you chase only money, you be chased by the money."
Money is just method for buying something. If our mind be buried monetary factors, we aren't different from mechine.
Reasons that the world operate well are not money. At least i think so.
It is same to object. We have to consider many elements in merchandise.
If we buy only cheaper one. We may get bad quality.
When we buy something, we have to think many thing for example quality, volume, and after service.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Lee~!^^ I'm glad because you don't need to be required constant supervision and direct assistance with your writing assignments and you're unable to complete an entire assignment without writing errors. Keep up the good work!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think money is important.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
 But here isn't only important thing to buy something.
>>>  But it isn't the only important thing to consider when buying something.
Sometimes, my father tell me that "If you chase only money, you be chased by the money."
>>> Sometimes, my father tells me that "If you chase only money, you will be chased by money."
Money is just method for buying something. 
>>> Money is just a thing to buy something
If our mind be buried monetary factors, we aren't different from mechine.
>>> If our mind will be buried by monetary factors, we aren't different from machines.
Reasons that the world operate well are not money. 
>>> The factor how the world could operate well is not money. 
At least I think so.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
It is same to object. 
>>> It's the same to the object. 
We have to consider many elements in merchandise.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
If we buy only cheaper one. We may get bad quality.
>>> If we buy the cheapest one, the quality may be bad.
When we buy something, we have to think many thing for example quality, volume, and after service.
>>> When we buy something, we have to consider many things for example the quality, volume, and after service.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133318 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1625
133317 Are there any new activities or events you\'re hoping to... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 2617
133316 Why do we sometimes need to interact with our colleagues? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 2421
133315 homework ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1379
133314 What would you do if you had an extra one to two hours in your... ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1784
133313 What comes to your mind whenever you hear the word \'chance\'? ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 2176
133312 If you were given a chance what would you choose, to change... Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 2057
133311 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1448
133310 Writing Task: What would you like to know about your friends... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1
133309 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1
133308 Imagine you have the opportunity to travel anywhere in the... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1
133307 Gift ÀÌ*¼Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1508
133306 I want to change my face alike jenny ¼­*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1890
133305 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is it important... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1
133304 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 0
133303 HOMEWORK FOR 12/14: Writing Task: Could children be gaslighted... ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 2458
133302 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1754
133301 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1632
133300 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1476
133299 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-18 1780

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04