¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2024-03-05 742

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Good evening.
Today was hectic.
It's somewhat weird because I always have thought that I was comfortable every Tuesday.
Working alone is for sure harder.
However, I guess that I felt happy working without him in the past.
Anyway, since there was no devil, our clinic was full of peace all day.
There was no more event about MJ.
I quitted joining our franchise, maybe this made him unhappier although I didn't mean it.
I decided to raise the salary of one manager, so I called her into my office.
I told her about her salary increase.
She is now 21 years, but she has a good responsibility and diligence and desire to improve herself.
I ate lunch with her and chief manager.
They seemed to be awkward because this was the first time to eat something with me.
I told them that I will change many things after MJ leaves.
I really want to make my clinic which gives happiness to me and my staff.
The expression of many staff already changed better because they got to know about MJ's leaving.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Dr. Kim!

First of all, your composition was almost perfect, congratulations! Truly, tough times makes you write and speak better English. However, I do not wish you more stress and headache just so you can speak good English. ^^

Anyway, finally you broke out the news about Dr. MJ to your staff. Now, your staff can work with ease and excellence. It is true that your staff need some level of work stress when they have to do things perfectly but they do not need more anxiety when someone does not support and believe them such as Dr. MJ.

This time, I guess, you also need to keep a safe distance from your managers and staff to maintain professional relations and avoid favoritism amongst them.

Then, your self s your only enemy in this setting. You will question and challenge your own decisions when the time comes that you will be finally alone. So always choose wisely in every situation.

I wish you all the best in your 'new' clinic soon.

Please browse over the suggestion I made for one of your sentences below.

See you then. 

-T. Donna~ 

Good evening.
>> Correct!

Today was hectic.
>> Correct!

It's somewhat weird because I always have thought that I was comfortable every Tuesday.
>> Correct!

Working alone is for sure harder.
>> Correct!

However, I guess that I felt happy working without him in the past.
>> Correct!

Anyway, since there was no devil, our clinic was full of peace all day.
>> Correct! Hahahaha! =)

There was no more event about MJ.
>> Correct!

I quitted joining our franchise, maybe this made him unhappier although I didn't mean it.
>> Correct!

I decided to raise the salary of one manager, so I called her into my office.
>> Correct!

I told her about her salary increase.
>> Correct!

She is now 21 years, but she has a good responsibility and diligence and desire to improve herself.
>> She is now 21 years old, but she has a good responsibility, diligence, and desire to improve herself.

I ate lunch with her and chief manager.
>> I ate lunch with her and the chief manager.

They seemed to be awkward because this was the first time to eat something with me.
>> Correct!

I told them that I will change many things after MJ leaves.
>> Correct!

I really want to make my clinic which gives happiness to me and my staff.
>> Correct!

The expression of many staff already changed better because they got to know about MJ's leaving.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133269 What is the nicest thing a classmate has said to you? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 489
133268 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 1156
133267 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 1
133266 test sample Te*002 ÁøÇàÁß 2023-12-15 877
133265 What springs to mind when you hear the word \'MONDAY\'? ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 3
133264 Do you worry about cyber crime? Why? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 1064
133263 diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 1
133262 Should children be allowed to use social networking sites? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 1185
133261 Change My Appearance ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 1051
133260 What kind of neighbor do you prefer to have? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 1430
133259 If you could choose one lifestyle to maintain, what would it be... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 2057
133258 What are the activities that your friends love doing but not for... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 1117
133257 Is there any skill that you are having a hard time learning? If... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 826
133256 >>> Can you recall (without looking) who and what are on your... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 1293
133255 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 664
133254 Homework 9 ±Ç*Å ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 1047
133253 Homework 8 ±Ç*Å ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 487
133252 Homework 8 ±Ç*Å ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 774
133251 Homework 7 ±Ç*Å ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 715
133250 Would you prefer to have a big family with many children, a... ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04