¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-03-05 583

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are some popular diets or eating trends in your country? Do you think they are effective?

Until recently, "ketogenic diet" are very trends for lose weight.
But, I think this kinds of diets, it's something wrong in Korea compared to other countries.
Originally, ketogeni-dieter eat salad, eggs, and small peace of meat.
However, in the case of Koreans who did ketogeni, they didn't eat carbohydrates such as rice, noodles, and bread.
But, they ate mainly meat such as pork belly, chicken, and fried food.
So, as a result I hear no one succese stories.
Actually, this diet trend was created by celebrities.
And the reason why so many people go on a lose weight or diet is influenced by the media.
Obesity is a problem, but excessive underweithgt is also problem.
Ths problem is many students and teenagers want to have an idol's body.
This is why teenagers think that celebrities fashion and body shape are standard of beauty.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are some popular diets or eating trends in your country? Do you think they are effective?


Until recently, "ketogenic diet" are very trends for lose weight.
>> Recently, "ketogenic diet" was quite a trend for losing weight.
But, I think this kinds of diets, it's something wrong in Korea compared to other countries.
>> But, I think there's something wrong with this kind of diet in Korea compared to other countries.
Originally, ketogeni-dieter eat salad, eggs, and small peace of meat.
>> Originally, ketogenic-dieters eat salads, eggs, and small pieces of meat.
However, in the case of Koreans who did ketogeni, they didn't eat carbohydrates such as rice, noodles, and bread.
>> However, in the case of Koreans who did ketogenic diet, they didn't eat carbohydrates such as rice, noodles, and bread.
But, they ate mainly meat such as pork belly, chicken, and fried food.
>> But, they mainly eat meat such as pork belly, chicken, and fried food.
So, as a result I hear no one succese stories.
>> So, as a result, I heard no one who had successful stories.
Actually, this diet trend was created by celebrities.
>> CORRECT!
And the reason why so many people go on a lose weight or diet is influenced by the media.
>> And the reason why so many people lose weight or do diet is because of the influence of social media.
Obesity is a problem, but excessive underweithgt is also problem.
>> Obesity is a problem, but excessive underweight is also problem.
Ths problem is many students and teenagers want to have an idol's body.
>> Ths problem happens to many students and teenagers who want to have an idol's body.
This is why teenagers think that celebrities' fashion and body shape are standards of beauty.
>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136978 What are the most important things in a job for you? (list your... ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 836
136977 HOMEWORK FOR 05.07.2024 WRITING TASK: What is the essence of... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 4
136976 What is so special about your hometown? ¿À*¼Ø ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 3
136975 Which fast food is most popular among your peers? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 574
136974 What are some things about your eating habits you want to change? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 848
136973 Does it bother you that people gamble on sporting events? ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 583
136972 Should women play basketball? ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 1215
136971 Home work ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 566
136970 What is your opinion on nursing homes? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 0
136969 homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 897
136968 Homework Á¤*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 606
136967 Short vowel sound ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 740
136966 Homework and Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-07 784
136965 Are men better chefs than women? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 711
136964 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 1203
136963 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 2
136962 How much money do you save every day? ¸Í*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 815
136961 homework 05.06 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 1196
136960 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 1013
136959 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-05-06 1117

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04