¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 03.04

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-03-04 857

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How do you manage your time between work and family?

These days, there are many people has a requirement when they get a job or look for a job a company in South Korea.
It's a work-life balance.
This word mean that many works require individual hobbies and rest do not focus on work at the company.
And, according to a recent survey, many people want personal rest more than work time at their company.
But the reality it's not easy to do what we want.
Actually, everyone wants to work less and earn a lot of money.
But the reality is that if we work for a small time, our salary will be reduce.
I'm also important to, time with family and hobbies.
However, if I don't have a money, I will miss the chance when I want to do something.
So, for that the chance, the balance of our walk-life balance will be shifted to one side.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How do you manage your time between work and family?


These days, there are many people has a requirement when they get a job or look for a job a company in South Korea.
>> These days, there are many people who have a requirement when they get a job or look for a job in a company in South Korea.
It's a work-life balance.
>> CORRECT!
This word mean that many works require individual hobbies and rest do not focus on work at the company.
>> This word means that many jobs require individual hobbies and the rest does not focus on the tasks in the company.
And, according to a recent survey, many people want personal rest more than work time in their company.
>> CORRECT!
But the reality it's not easy to do what we want.
>> But in reality, it's not easy to do what we want.
Actually, everyone wants to work less and earn a lot of money.
>> CORRECT!
But the reality is that if we work for a small time, our salary will be reduce.
>> But the reality is that if we work for a short amount of time, our salary will be reduced.
I'm also important to, time with family and hobbies.
>> It's also important to spend time with my family and for my hobbies.
However, if I don't have a money, I will miss the chance when I want to do something.
>> CORRECT!
So, for that the chance, the balance of our walk-life balance will be shifted to one side.
>> So, for that chance, our work-life balance will be shifted to one side.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136776 What is the best thing to do to overcome stress? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 734
136775 A long face ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 1049
136774 benefits of eating raw meat ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 1041
136773 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 1008
136772 homework 04.26 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 859
136771 What was the last TV program you watched? Tell me more about it. ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 766
136770 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 3
136769 Choose the correct preposition for the following sentences ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 788
136768 What ride do you like the most in an amusement park? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 976
136767 the city where I live is jeonsan ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 906
136766 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 786
136765 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 3
136764 urban ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 0
136763 Do you love peace and quiet? Where do you go to feel that way? ±è* ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 0
136762 What do you think of ? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 661
136761 How do you think the popularity of e-bikes will evolve in the... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 652
136760 Can you describe your typical Wednesday? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 779
136759 How do personal goals and career ambitions influence the choice... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 1263
136758 2024.04.26 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 1
136757 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-26 611

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04