무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What are the causes of racism?

작성자: 이*윤
2024-03-02 863

회원님의 영작문



ha ha ha
too long again :D
check the attached file.
Have nice weekend!

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thank you, Yun!

You know, discrimination exists everywhere, and it is due to our differences. Some people believe that they are superior and better than others, which is one of the primary reasons why we live in such an unsettling world we fail to acknowledge that we are all different. :( I hope we become more understanding and courteous of one another. 

Chammy

It seems to be a very difficult and controversial topic.

I think it's for big two reasons.

First, I think it's because of historical causes or special issues.

For example, a country that colonized and ruled would be considered superior to that country, and some people may still be considered so.

Not necessarily, but the United States was a country that practiced black slavery, so they thought white people were superior to black people, and there seems to be a social idea that discriminates against black people because there are still people who think so.

>>Correct

I think COVID-19 is a representative example of a special issues.

>>I think COVID-19 is a representative example of a special issue.

At first, it was known that COVID-19 was created in China, so there were many sudden racist crimes, such as Asian people are assaulted in many countries.

>>At first, it was known that COVID-19 was created in China, so there were many sudden racist crimes, such as Asian people being assaulted in many countries.

The moment I think some people superior to any race, tragedy is likey to happen.

>>The moment I think some people are superior to any race, tragedy is likely to happen.

Second, I think it's because of negative images or preconceptions.

>>Correct

For example, some Koreans consider Chineses to be rude rich.

>>For example, some Koreans consider Chinese to be rude and rich.

This is because Chineses who came to sightseeing often showed thier rude manners.

>>This is because Chinese who went sightseeing often showed their rude manners.

That's why a negative image was created and based on it, Chineses began to be viewed negatively.

>>That's why a negative image was created and based on it, the Chinese began to be viewed negatively.

Also, because there is a preconceived notion that countries such as developing countries are poorer that Korea, foregin workers come to Korea to make money, and people think that workers are naturally from developing countries, resulting in discriminations and problems.

>>Also, because there is a preconceived notion that countries such as developing countries are poorer than Korea, foreign workers come to Korea to make money, and people think that workers are naturally from developing countries, resulting in discrimination and problems.

I think it's a little better now, but because there are still many issues of racism in our country, the problem should be taken seriously and the government takes countermeasures.

>> I think it's a little better now, but because there are still many issues of racism in our country, the problem should be taken seriously and the government should take countermeasures.

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
132051 WRITING TASK: Why do you think people like to invite their... 임*지 완료 2023-10-31 3
132050 Diary 김*연 완료 2023-10-31 0
132049 HOMEWORK-231031 양*애 완료 2023-10-31 1
132048 Homework 류*우 완료 2023-10-31 713
132047 Which kind of music do you like? 송*우 완료 2023-10-31 528
132046 homework 정*안 완료 2023-10-31 0
132045 The most important factor 양*연 완료 2023-10-31 637
132044 homework_231030 한*록 완료 2023-10-31 0
132043 Homework 안*숙 완료 2023-10-31 391
132042 The art of leadership is saying no, not saying yes. It is very... 김*아 완료 2023-10-31 982
132041 Homework 정*환 완료 2023-10-31 6
132040 30.Oct.2023 김*정 완료 2023-10-31 2
132039 When do you prefer having a family gathering? 신*정 완료 2023-10-31 518
132038 Do you enjoy doing indoor activities, or do you prefer doing... 이*준 완료 2023-10-31 499
132037 Homework 김*님 완료 2023-10-31 950
132036 Letter 오*봄 완료 2023-10-31 1
132035 According to a survey conducted, Korea has the highest cases of... 이*희 완료 2023-10-31 867
132034 A gadget that I don\'t use 최*환 완료 2023-10-30 513
132033 Homework 김*우 완료 2023-10-30 1314
132032 homework 최*� 완료 2023-10-30 682

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]