¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 03.01

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-03-01 1148

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How does dementia affect a person¡¯s daily life?


I think the dementia is a sad disease.
Most dementia have a harder time to the family around patients than do.
This means that most dementia patients don\'t know well if they has sick.
And, their behavior, memory and speaking style are becoming more and more child.
Healthy old people don\'t need a guardian all day.
But, the dementia patients must need a guardian.
Because, these patients can\'t live alone.
Actually, we already know well.
Investing our own time to take care of our family members or patients is a difficult choice.
And it\'s receive with a lot of stress.
Sadly, a lot of miserable reality comes out on the news.
That\'s why I was mentioned that this is a sad disease.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How does dementia affect a person¡¯s daily life?



I think the dementia is a sad disease.
>> I think dementia is a sad disease.
Most dementia have a harder time to the family around patients than do.
>> Most patients with dementia have a hard time around their family members.
This means that most dementia patients don\'t know well if they has sick.
>> This means that most dementia patients don't know well if they are sick.
And, their behavior, memory and speaking style are becoming more and more child.
>> And, their behavior, memory and speaking style are becoming more like a child.
Healthy old people don't need a guardian all day.
>> CORRECT!
But, the dementia patients must need a guardian.
>> But, dementia patients must need a guardian.
Because, these patients can't live alone.
>> CORRECT!
Actually, we already know well.
>> Actually, we already know it well.
Investing our own time to take care of our family members or patients is a difficult choice.
>> CORRECT!
And it's receive with a lot of stress.
>> And we receive a lot of stress.
Sadly, a lot of miserable reality comes out on the news.
>> CORRECT!
That's why I was mentioned that this is a sad disease.
>> That's why I have mentioned that this is a sad disease.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132494 Do you think people have fewer goals as they get older? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 2275
132493 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 1787
132492 What kind of community do you have in Ulsan? Write about it. ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 2
132491 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 2476
132490 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 2
132489 Cooking ÀÌ*¼Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 2567
132488 Do you think that one day there will be just one language in the... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 2
132487 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Would you like... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 3
132486 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 0
132485 How do you clean your body? ÃÖ*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 1737
132484 The advantages of sharing my worries with my family °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 1
132483 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 3023
132482 Does music have the power to change your mood? ÀÌ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 4
132481 Letter ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 1
132480 Survey ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 1
132479 How do you think social media platforms contribute to the... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 1
132478 pention ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 2399
132477 homework ¾È*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 1875
132476 How long does it take you to take a shower? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 1966
132475 In English, there are sick jokes, private jokes, cruel jokes,... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-16 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04