¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 03.01

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-03-01 333

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How does dementia affect a person¡¯s daily life?


I think the dementia is a sad disease.
Most dementia have a harder time to the family around patients than do.
This means that most dementia patients don\'t know well if they has sick.
And, their behavior, memory and speaking style are becoming more and more child.
Healthy old people don\'t need a guardian all day.
But, the dementia patients must need a guardian.
Because, these patients can\'t live alone.
Actually, we already know well.
Investing our own time to take care of our family members or patients is a difficult choice.
And it\'s receive with a lot of stress.
Sadly, a lot of miserable reality comes out on the news.
That\'s why I was mentioned that this is a sad disease.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How does dementia affect a person¡¯s daily life?



I think the dementia is a sad disease.
>> I think dementia is a sad disease.
Most dementia have a harder time to the family around patients than do.
>> Most patients with dementia have a hard time around their family members.
This means that most dementia patients don\'t know well if they has sick.
>> This means that most dementia patients don't know well if they are sick.
And, their behavior, memory and speaking style are becoming more and more child.
>> And, their behavior, memory and speaking style are becoming more like a child.
Healthy old people don't need a guardian all day.
>> CORRECT!
But, the dementia patients must need a guardian.
>> But, dementia patients must need a guardian.
Because, these patients can't live alone.
>> CORRECT!
Actually, we already know well.
>> Actually, we already know it well.
Investing our own time to take care of our family members or patients is a difficult choice.
>> CORRECT!
And it's receive with a lot of stress.
>> And we receive a lot of stress.
Sadly, a lot of miserable reality comes out on the news.
>> CORRECT!
That's why I was mentioned that this is a sad disease.
>> That's why I have mentioned that this is a sad disease.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134808 What advantage do you believe entry-level applicants have when... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 302
134807 Homework ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 289
134806 Homework ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 352
134805 homework 02.19 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 149
134804 How have your interests changed as the eyars went by? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 212
134803 How can we gind the owner ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 0
134802 I like my family À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 522
134801 We always have to be careful ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 0
134800 The song can comfort people ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 0
134799 I don\'t know much about tradition....;) À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 399
134798 I\'d like to live on my own when I\'m about 25. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 413
134797 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 3
134796 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 176
134795 2023.02.19 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 2
134794 2/15 homework ³ë*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 1
134793 When will you contact him and what will you say? ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 2
134792 Describea book, movie, or piece of music that has had a... ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 350
134791 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 249
134790 Do you allow someone to decide for you? ±Ç*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 0
134789 Living in cities vs rural areas ÀÓ*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-19 322

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04