¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 03.01

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-03-01 988

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How does dementia affect a person¡¯s daily life?


I think the dementia is a sad disease.
Most dementia have a harder time to the family around patients than do.
This means that most dementia patients don\'t know well if they has sick.
And, their behavior, memory and speaking style are becoming more and more child.
Healthy old people don\'t need a guardian all day.
But, the dementia patients must need a guardian.
Because, these patients can\'t live alone.
Actually, we already know well.
Investing our own time to take care of our family members or patients is a difficult choice.
And it\'s receive with a lot of stress.
Sadly, a lot of miserable reality comes out on the news.
That\'s why I was mentioned that this is a sad disease.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How does dementia affect a person¡¯s daily life?



I think the dementia is a sad disease.
>> I think dementia is a sad disease.
Most dementia have a harder time to the family around patients than do.
>> Most patients with dementia have a hard time around their family members.
This means that most dementia patients don\'t know well if they has sick.
>> This means that most dementia patients don't know well if they are sick.
And, their behavior, memory and speaking style are becoming more and more child.
>> And, their behavior, memory and speaking style are becoming more like a child.
Healthy old people don't need a guardian all day.
>> CORRECT!
But, the dementia patients must need a guardian.
>> But, dementia patients must need a guardian.
Because, these patients can't live alone.
>> CORRECT!
Actually, we already know well.
>> Actually, we already know it well.
Investing our own time to take care of our family members or patients is a difficult choice.
>> CORRECT!
And it's receive with a lot of stress.
>> And we receive a lot of stress.
Sadly, a lot of miserable reality comes out on the news.
>> CORRECT!
That's why I was mentioned that this is a sad disease.
>> That's why I have mentioned that this is a sad disease.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136656 Dropping a line ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 712
136655 Describe a new thing you\'ve tried recently. ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1249
136654 Have you ever been to a farm? Write about it. Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1061
136653 What are the things that you are so excited to try? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1074
136652 P.02 homework : How would you help someone overcome his fears? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1140
136651 What kind of TV shows would you like to see more on local TV? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 3
136650 What do you hope to achieve the most in the future? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 924
136649 2024.04.22 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1108
136648 mobile class Te*002 ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1
136647 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1032
136646 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1280
136645 What can be done to address concerns about safety on public... À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1
136644 How do other people\'s opinions affect your decisions and... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 881
136643 TikTok and Samsung Lions ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1078
136642 rural ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 2
136641 HOMEWORK FOR 04.23.2024 WRITING TASK: What will you tell someone... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 3
136640 What are the popular places for vacation in your country? ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1336
136639 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1086
136638 HW ³ª*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 1125
136637 What\'s your favorite Korean holiday and why? ±æ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-23 8

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04