¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 03.01

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-03-01 702

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How does dementia affect a person¡¯s daily life?


I think the dementia is a sad disease.
Most dementia have a harder time to the family around patients than do.
This means that most dementia patients don\'t know well if they has sick.
And, their behavior, memory and speaking style are becoming more and more child.
Healthy old people don\'t need a guardian all day.
But, the dementia patients must need a guardian.
Because, these patients can\'t live alone.
Actually, we already know well.
Investing our own time to take care of our family members or patients is a difficult choice.
And it\'s receive with a lot of stress.
Sadly, a lot of miserable reality comes out on the news.
That\'s why I was mentioned that this is a sad disease.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
How does dementia affect a person¡¯s daily life?



I think the dementia is a sad disease.
>> I think dementia is a sad disease.
Most dementia have a harder time to the family around patients than do.
>> Most patients with dementia have a hard time around their family members.
This means that most dementia patients don\'t know well if they has sick.
>> This means that most dementia patients don't know well if they are sick.
And, their behavior, memory and speaking style are becoming more and more child.
>> And, their behavior, memory and speaking style are becoming more like a child.
Healthy old people don't need a guardian all day.
>> CORRECT!
But, the dementia patients must need a guardian.
>> But, dementia patients must need a guardian.
Because, these patients can't live alone.
>> CORRECT!
Actually, we already know well.
>> Actually, we already know it well.
Investing our own time to take care of our family members or patients is a difficult choice.
>> CORRECT!
And it's receive with a lot of stress.
>> And we receive a lot of stress.
Sadly, a lot of miserable reality comes out on the news.
>> CORRECT!
That's why I was mentioned that this is a sad disease.
>> That's why I have mentioned that this is a sad disease.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136818 What is Hachiko Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 1032
136817 What is your favorite thing to watch on your phone or computer?... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 1514
136816 homework 04.29 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 826
136815 HW ³ª*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 1000
136814 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 784
136813 What is the best advice you could everr give someone? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 681
136812 Do you think that one day there will be just one language in the... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 885
136811 What sport is difficult for you? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 979
136810 2024.04.29 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 0
136809 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 1117
136808 Would you like to visit Pyramid or a Giza of Egypt? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 913
136807 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 1157
136806 That kind of culture is common in other countries where they use... ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 4
136805 What is your favorite thing about yourself? Explain. ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 2
136804 What do you think of black and white photography ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 1
136803 How important is good customer service to the success of a... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 0
136802 Have you ever had to save anyone from drowning? Would you know... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 578
136801 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 733
136800 How do you feel about your parents older? À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 1
136799 Was there a time that you lacked sleep and food? õ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-04-29 902

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04