¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Importance of beauty

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*À²
2024-02-24 362

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think beauty is important.
Because, many people like and prefer beauty, so it becomes generalize.
However, there are the most important thing.
That is what is inside our heart.
Beauty is just outside.
The inside of our heart makes us more beautiful.
Therefore, I think beauty is important but the inside of our heart is also important.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Julie! These corrections aim to improve the clarity, grammar, and flow of the original text. I hope it helps. Thank you!
Sincerely,
^^ T. Ara

I think beauty is important.
>>> I believe beauty is important 
Because, many people like and prefer beauty, so it becomes 
generalize.
>>> because many people appreciate it, making it a common preference. 
However, there are the most important thing.
>>> However, what's truly essential 
That is what is inside our heart.
>>> is what lies within our hearts. 
Beauty is just outside.
>>> While beauty is external, 
The inside of our heart makes us more beautiful.
>>> the goodness inside our hearts ultimately defines our true beauty. 
Therefore, I think beauty is important but the inside of our heart is also important.
>>> Therefore, I consider beauty important, but the inner beauty of our hearts holds equal significance.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134190 What do you usually prepare during family gatherings? Why?... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 682
134189 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 0
134188 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 993
134187 What is the difference of Daejon and Seoul\'s transportation... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 740
134186 i want to try international food is.. ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 545
134185 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 0
134184 I agree all of it. °í*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 631
134183 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 754
134182 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 579
134181 1/23 homework ³ë*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 2
134180 What do you think are the pros and cons of international... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1053
134179 homework ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1
134178 homework 2024-01-25 ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1
134177 Modern Technology is creating a single-world culture õ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 504
134176 Homework ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 969
134175 stop ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 576
134174 Disparity between universities ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 631
134173 The situation when I go to a buffet ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 666
134172 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Modern... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1
134171 When you ask someone for a favor, what are the things you should... À±*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-01-24 839

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04