¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is your reason for wanting to be a flight attendant?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: õ*Àº
2024-02-21 1334

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

After graduated culinary school and worked in F&B field, I felt like I need more achievement and opportunity to work with diverse people.
I looked back on myself and what I really enjoyed and bring me satisfaction was interacting with new people and taking care of their needs.
If I become a flight attendant, my personality and service experience are gonna be perfect as a cabin crew and I can broaden my view and improve my skills by various experience.
Also, I think aviation industry is fascinating to me, because we can connect people from all over the world and it would be never get boring.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Rachel!

The Food and Beverage department as well as being  a cabin crew are interrelated since they both deal with service and human relations. You are not changing your career totally. You are only adding more skills to what you already have. I think you are doing great at it.

Below, you can see very few grammar suggestions. Your sentences are long and meaningful as well as interconnected by correct transition words. There is also efficiency in your use of vocabulary words. You did a very good job!

Thank you for your diligence. See you again tomorrow!

-T. Donna~

After graduated culinary school and worked in F&B field, I felt like I need more achievement and opportunity to work with diverse people.
>> After I graduated in culinary school and worked in the F&B field, I felt like I need more achievements and opportunities to work with diverse people.

I looked back on myself and what I really enjoyed and bring me satisfaction was interacting with new people and taking care of their needs.
>> I looked back on myself and what I really enjoyed and what brings me satisfaction was interacting with new people and taking care of their needs.

If I become a flight attendant, my personality and service experience are gonna be perfect as a cabin crew and I can broaden my view and improve my skills by various experience.
>> If I become a flight attendant, my personality and service experiences are gonna be/ (going to be)  perfect as a cabin crew and I can broaden my view and improve my skills by various experiences. Very good sentence!

Also, I think aviation industry is fascinating to me, because we can connect people from all over the world and it would be never get boring.
>> Also, I  think that the aviation industry is fascinating to me, because we can connect with people from all over the world and it would be never get boring. Very good sentence!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129130 Homework ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2034
129129 How will you help a friend who is experiencing a sexual assault?... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 5
129128 What kind of work environment do you prefer for your ideal job? Á¶*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 0
129127 homework È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1
129126 Homework ¼Û*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2618
129125 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2130
129124 27.Jun.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2
129123 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2192
129122 HOMEWORK3 ÀÌ*½Â ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 0
129121 Describe how movies influence your look at life. ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2
129120 Please correct my sentence ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 4
129119 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1909
129118 crops ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1
129117 homework 06.27 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 2843
129116 Homework 6/26 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1
129115 What hobbies do you enjoy? Why? °­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 2333
129114 The fiercest animal that I have seen ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 2485
129113 Can you kill insects in your house? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1423
129112 I disagree! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 1766
129111 What is the best place in your country? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-27 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04