¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*
2024-02-19 1613

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®



I put the photo cuz I wrote over 1000 letters

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning, Geon!
Wow, this is really fantastic! I like the way you expressed your thoughts and how you finalized the story.
I am a parents myself, even if we don't agree with our child's opinion, parents are always there to show support.
Have a good day!
T. Aki~

I have a case with my sister. As you know, she is with German husband.
>>> I have a case with my sister. As you know, she is with a German husband.

When they were in a relationship and my parents knew it for the first time, my parents didn't allow them strongly.
>>>  CORRECT!

They thought there are some complicated problem and the big reason was different nationality.
>>> They thought there were some complicated problems and the big reason was different nationalities.

They were not opened yet, but the thing was changed after we met together for the first time with her German boyfriend.
>>> They were not open yet, but the thing changed after meeting her German boyfriend personally for the first time.

He came to Korea to meet us and we spent together in Korea over a month.
>>> He came to Korea to meet us and we spent time together for over a month.

During that time, my parents had been opened their mind step by step, they could undertsnag that he is such a good person, even our nationality is different.
>>> During that time, my parents had opened their minds gradually, they could understand that he was such a good person, even though our nationality is different.

Now they are going to get marriage this year and my parents are really happy about that.
>>> Now they are going to get married this year and my parents are really happy about that.

It's not important my family's opinion about my partner' It's my conclusion from this story. I didn't mean there is no connection.
>>> It's not important my family's opinion about my partner' It's my conclusion from this story. I didn't mean there was no connection.

There is a line that says "Children are the mirror of their parents."
>>> CORRECT!

I'm quite agree with that because naturally our perspective are based on our parents's one while we are grown up.
>>> I quite agree with that because naturally our perspective is based on our parents while we are growing up.

When we think about our partner in a positive sense, there is a high possibility that our parents would like our partner.
>>> When we think about our partner in a positive sense, there is a high possibility that our parents would like our partner.

Even they don't like him/her at the first time, as time goes on they will open their mind step by step like what my parents did.
>>> Even they don't like him/her at first time, as time goes on they will open their minds gradually like what my parents did.

Just take our time to understand.
>>> It just takes time to understand.

If they are good parents, there are no parents who block their children decision.
>>> If they are good parents, there are no parents who will interfere with their children's decisions.



























¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140536 What would change if money didn¡¯t exist but people still had to... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 866
140535 Can you think of a time when doing nothing was the best action? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 1012
140534 Should kids have more of a say in decisions made by their... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 974
140533 What do you do to maintain or improve your mental health? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 1118
140532 Homework ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 1083
140531 Why do you think many people smoke? Àå*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 968
140530 Too many students earning degrees have diluted the value of a... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 1004
140529 What do you enjoy most about autumn? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 953
140528 How do you see yourself growing or advancing in your ideal... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 987
140527 Have you ever had to step in and help during a difficult time... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 942
140526 Why do you think apologizing is important in relationships? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 1163
140525 18oct2024-Homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 890
140524 Can people change their personality if they want to? Do you know... ÀÎ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 1271
140523 Does an age difference make it difficult to be friends? ÀÎ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 1077
140522 Moving grave ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 909
140521 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 1054
140520 My most memorable trip destination is ¡¯New Zealand¡¯ ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-21 1130
140519 I think save the money is strong point of going Dutch ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-20 1
140518 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-20 1
140517 What do you think of reporting or newscasting as a job? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-20 986

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04