¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 02.15

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-02-15 1205

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Do you think it¡¯s necessary to have a gym membership to stay fit?

If we don't have a special hobby, I think it's good way to have exercise hobby.
In my opinion, the potential of the hobby of exercising is endless.
If we did hard exercise and feel changes and get health in our bodies, we will feel like we are getting a big reward.
And, I think this feeling also affects mental health.
For example, we will always have a positive mind.
If you don't know how to doing exercise, rather I think it's good to go to the gym.
Because we can experience most of the exercise at the gym.
However, the will and persistence are important.
I also failed a lot.
Because, I often give up when exercising interesting changed not fun.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Do you think it¡¯s necessary to have a gym membership to stay fit?


If we don't have a special hobby, I think it's good way to have exercise hobby.
>> If we don't have a special hobby, I think it's a good way to have exercise as a hobby.
In my opinion, the potential of the hobby of exercising is endless.
>> CORRECT!
If we did hard exercise and feel changes and get health in our bodies, we will feel like we are getting a big reward.
>> If we exercise hardly and feel changes. and get our bodies in good shape, we will feel like we are getting a big reward.
And, I think this feeling also affects mental health.
>> And, I think this feeling also affects our mental health.
For example, we will always have a positive mind.
>> CORRECT!
If you don't know how to doing exercise, rather I think it's good to go to the gym.
>> If you don't know how to do exercises, I think it's good to go to the gym.
Because we can experience most of the exercise at the gym.
>> It's because we can experience most of the exercises at the gym.
However, the will and persistence are important.
>> CORRECT!
I also failed a lot.
>> CORRECT!
Because, I often give up when exercising interesting changed not fun.
>> Because, I often give up when exercising is not interesting anymore, or if it's not fun.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
127164 Does your country provide free dental treatments? Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1
127163 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 0
127162 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 799
127161 4.4 homework ±Ç*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 695
127160 4.4 Homework ¹Ú*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1036
127159 What do you do when someone you need to talk to is a million... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1265
127158 Why do we need to greet the people around us? Á¶*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 664
127157 Homework ¹è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 714
127156 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 770
127155 INTERVENTION PLAN ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1052
127154 Bag ±Ç*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 2
127153 4.3 Homework ¹Ú*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1199
127152 Like a rose between two thrones ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 795
127151 What do you want to eat? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 0
127150 Greeting kind of annoys me ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1377
127149 HOMEWORK: Please write something about the topic below: 1. What... ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 1
127148 The important lessons that I can get from the novel ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-04-04 5
127147 23.04.03 ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 1059
127146 English À±*¼º ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 1046
127145 The social activity ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-03 892

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04