¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 02.15

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-02-15 964

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Do you think it¡¯s necessary to have a gym membership to stay fit?

If we don't have a special hobby, I think it's good way to have exercise hobby.
In my opinion, the potential of the hobby of exercising is endless.
If we did hard exercise and feel changes and get health in our bodies, we will feel like we are getting a big reward.
And, I think this feeling also affects mental health.
For example, we will always have a positive mind.
If you don't know how to doing exercise, rather I think it's good to go to the gym.
Because we can experience most of the exercise at the gym.
However, the will and persistence are important.
I also failed a lot.
Because, I often give up when exercising interesting changed not fun.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Do you think it¡¯s necessary to have a gym membership to stay fit?


If we don't have a special hobby, I think it's good way to have exercise hobby.
>> If we don't have a special hobby, I think it's a good way to have exercise as a hobby.
In my opinion, the potential of the hobby of exercising is endless.
>> CORRECT!
If we did hard exercise and feel changes and get health in our bodies, we will feel like we are getting a big reward.
>> If we exercise hardly and feel changes. and get our bodies in good shape, we will feel like we are getting a big reward.
And, I think this feeling also affects mental health.
>> And, I think this feeling also affects our mental health.
For example, we will always have a positive mind.
>> CORRECT!
If you don't know how to doing exercise, rather I think it's good to go to the gym.
>> If you don't know how to do exercises, I think it's good to go to the gym.
Because we can experience most of the exercise at the gym.
>> It's because we can experience most of the exercises at the gym.
However, the will and persistence are important.
>> CORRECT!
I also failed a lot.
>> CORRECT!
Because, I often give up when exercising interesting changed not fun.
>> Because, I often give up when exercising is not interesting anymore, or if it's not fun.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129896 feeling of less sleep. ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 4130
129895 Do you agree that recording devices should be placed in... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 2
129894 How do you learn to become fluent in a foreign language? ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 2
129893 Day10 ½Å*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 0
129892 homework 08.01 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 1973
129891 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 0
129890 Homework ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 1
129889 The best thing about my summer vacation ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 2985
129888 Why is it importan to study English? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 2251
129887 How do sports contribute to building social connections among... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 3772
129886 Homework for 05/26 ¹æ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 2
129885 What do you want to colle? ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 2738
129884 Homework ¿À*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 2556
129883 Why is English fluency significant for you? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 2229
129882 best ways to avoid getting sick ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 2485
129881 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 4660
129880 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 2403
129879 What is health care like for old and poor people in your country? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 2911
129878 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 3510
129877 HW ¹Ú*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-01 6

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04