¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 02.15

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-02-15 714

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Do you think it¡¯s necessary to have a gym membership to stay fit?

If we don't have a special hobby, I think it's good way to have exercise hobby.
In my opinion, the potential of the hobby of exercising is endless.
If we did hard exercise and feel changes and get health in our bodies, we will feel like we are getting a big reward.
And, I think this feeling also affects mental health.
For example, we will always have a positive mind.
If you don't know how to doing exercise, rather I think it's good to go to the gym.
Because we can experience most of the exercise at the gym.
However, the will and persistence are important.
I also failed a lot.
Because, I often give up when exercising interesting changed not fun.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Do you think it¡¯s necessary to have a gym membership to stay fit?


If we don't have a special hobby, I think it's good way to have exercise hobby.
>> If we don't have a special hobby, I think it's a good way to have exercise as a hobby.
In my opinion, the potential of the hobby of exercising is endless.
>> CORRECT!
If we did hard exercise and feel changes and get health in our bodies, we will feel like we are getting a big reward.
>> If we exercise hardly and feel changes. and get our bodies in good shape, we will feel like we are getting a big reward.
And, I think this feeling also affects mental health.
>> And, I think this feeling also affects our mental health.
For example, we will always have a positive mind.
>> CORRECT!
If you don't know how to doing exercise, rather I think it's good to go to the gym.
>> If you don't know how to do exercises, I think it's good to go to the gym.
Because we can experience most of the exercise at the gym.
>> It's because we can experience most of the exercises at the gym.
However, the will and persistence are important.
>> CORRECT!
I also failed a lot.
>> CORRECT!
Because, I often give up when exercising interesting changed not fun.
>> Because, I often give up when exercising is not interesting anymore, or if it's not fun.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133405 Reasons of a dual income couple °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1
133404 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 963
133403 Memory in Christmas ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 1344
133402 What makes people give up on dieting or exercising? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 935
133401 Cooking ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 1079
133400 homework 12.21 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 1536
133399 Homework 12/20 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 1
133398 ¼÷Á¦ ±Ç*Å ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 1019
133397 Do you think you could survive better in the mountains or jungle? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 3
133396 Explain how to make a bed. This task is seemingly simple but... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 1738
133395 What are your thoughts on religious holidays? Why do think we... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 0
133394 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 1217
133393 Please complete the sentences ÇÏ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 1
133392 In your own opinion, what are the unacceptable reasons for... ÇÏ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 1
133391 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is celebrating... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 2
133390 Do you think the school day should be longer or shorter than it... ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 1323
133389 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 891
133388 What comes to mind whenever you hear the expression... ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 1
133387 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 1232
133386 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-21 726

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04