¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 02.15

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-02-15 203

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Do you think it¡¯s necessary to have a gym membership to stay fit?

If we don't have a special hobby, I think it's good way to have exercise hobby.
In my opinion, the potential of the hobby of exercising is endless.
If we did hard exercise and feel changes and get health in our bodies, we will feel like we are getting a big reward.
And, I think this feeling also affects mental health.
For example, we will always have a positive mind.
If you don't know how to doing exercise, rather I think it's good to go to the gym.
Because we can experience most of the exercise at the gym.
However, the will and persistence are important.
I also failed a lot.
Because, I often give up when exercising interesting changed not fun.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Do you think it¡¯s necessary to have a gym membership to stay fit?


If we don't have a special hobby, I think it's good way to have exercise hobby.
>> If we don't have a special hobby, I think it's a good way to have exercise as a hobby.
In my opinion, the potential of the hobby of exercising is endless.
>> CORRECT!
If we did hard exercise and feel changes and get health in our bodies, we will feel like we are getting a big reward.
>> If we exercise hardly and feel changes. and get our bodies in good shape, we will feel like we are getting a big reward.
And, I think this feeling also affects mental health.
>> And, I think this feeling also affects our mental health.
For example, we will always have a positive mind.
>> CORRECT!
If you don't know how to doing exercise, rather I think it's good to go to the gym.
>> If you don't know how to do exercises, I think it's good to go to the gym.
Because we can experience most of the exercise at the gym.
>> It's because we can experience most of the exercises at the gym.
However, the will and persistence are important.
>> CORRECT!
I also failed a lot.
>> CORRECT!
Because, I often give up when exercising interesting changed not fun.
>> Because, I often give up when exercising is not interesting anymore, or if it's not fun.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135407 Do you feel comfortable talking to a boss or client by phone?... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 456
135406 2023.03.11 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 4
135405 Homework ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 306
135404 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 605
135403 Do you think teachers should be strict sometimes? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 511
135402 Should we always do our best in everything that we do? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 508
135401 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Would you... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 3
135400 How does facing and overcoming fears help people grow as... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 1
135399 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 0
135398 What stories have you read or heard recently about the... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 539
135397 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 1
135396 What is your all-time favorite dish, and why? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 580
135395 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 460
135394 A million dollars ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 366
135393 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 536
135392 My Three Thing To Achieve ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 705
135391 >> How does the weather affect your mood? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 429
135390 >> What are your thoughts on your school class schedule? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 0
135389 What musical insterments do you play? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 578
135388 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04