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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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What is a very important skill a person should learn in order to be successful in the world today?

작성자: 정*환
2024-02-12 1668

회원님의 영작문

Chammy.
Did you have good time during long holiday.
In my case, I was busy serving meals but one more employees was hired who had already experience in hosipitality industry.
I have no time to teach her how to work but she knew what to do.
So everything went well during busy holiday.



What is a very important skill a person should learn in order to be successful in the world today?
As I read many books about successful stories, I realized the good habbit can be one of the important skills in order to be successful.
Good habbits such as exercise and doing as the plans make people more smart.
Everyone knows exercise is helpful for their health and a few people do it as the plans.
Key point is knowing and doing are different. If the successful people think it is right, they do it aggressively.
If it was failed, they find another good way to solve it.
So I learned those skills with the books and tried to follow their habbits.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Han!
I notice that most of your answers nowadays are inspired by the books you are reading... I must say that your chosen books are serving its purpose well ^_^ 
By the way, I had a fun and tiring holiday... "Normal" people's holiday break is over now and it's your turn to enjoy the break tomorrow~ hehehe Have fun!^^
Chammy
Chammy.
Did you have good time during long holiday.
>>Did you have a good time during the long holiday?
In my case, I was busy serving meals but one more employees was hired who had already experience in hosipitality industry.
>> In my case, I was busy serving meals but one more employee was hired who had already experience in the hospitality industry.
I have no time to teach her how to work but she knew what to do.
>>I had no time to teach her how to work but she knew what to do.
So everything went well during busy holiday.
>>So everything went well during the busy holiday.
As I read many books about successful stories, I realized the good habbit can be one of the important skills in order to be successful.
>>As I read many books about successful stories, I realized that good habits can be one of the important skills to be successful.
Good habbits such as exercise and doing as the plans make people more smart.
>>Good habits such as exercise and doing as the plan make people smarter
Everyone knows exercise is helpful for their health and a few people do it as the plans.
>> Everyone knows exercise is helpful for their health and a few people do it as they plan.
Key point is knowing and doing are different. If the successful people think it is right, they do it aggressively.
>> The key point is that knowing and doing are different. If the successful people think it is right, they do it aggressively.
If it was failed, they find another good way to solve it.
>>If it fails, they find another good way to solve it.
So I learned those skills with the books and tried to follow their habbits.
>>So I learned those skills with the books and tried to follow their habits.
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127390 Homework 박*민 완료 2023-04-12 2
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127382 How can you encourage more members to join your activities? 류*선 완료 2023-04-12 1
127381 today\'s homework 추*미 완료 2023-04-12 2
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