¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think is the worst kind of crime?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2024-02-06 1073

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think the worst crime is a child sex offense. There are many kind of people around the world. However, some strangers rape child. And then, some people make a porno with child. Normally, people don't try thinking of it. But, only few strangers make a vibe scared. Another crime is a firearm accident only in the USA. Most people in the USA have their guns. That's why the firearm accident rate is high. They claim if you don't have own gun, you won't protect yourself. I can't understand the insistence. Of course, the states is the biggest country, the police can't control all of the areas. I believe there is an another way.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Eric!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


I think the worst crime is a child sex offense. 
>> I think the worst crime is a child and sex offense. 
There are many kind of people around the world. 
>> There are many kinds of people around the world. 
However, some strangers rape child. 
>> However, some strangers rape a child. 
OR >> >> However, some strangers rape children.
And then, some people make a porno with child. 
>> And then, some people involve children with pornography.
Normally, people don't try thinking of it. 
>> Normally, people don't try to think about it. 
But, only few strangers make a vibe scared. 
>> CORRECT!
Another crime is a firearm accident only in the USA. 
>> CORRECT!
Most people in the USA have their guns. 
>> CORRECT!
That's why the firearm accident rate is high. 
>> CORRECT!
They claim if you don't have own gun, you won't protect yourself. 
>> They claim that if you don't have your own gun, you won't be able to protect yourself. 
I can't understand the insistence. 
>> CORRECT!
Of course, the states is the biggest country, the police can't control all of the areas. 
>> CORRECT!
I believe there is an another way.
>> I believe there is another way.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132017 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 1760
132016 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 0
132015 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 0
132014 In a scale of 1-10, how do you rate the drug problem in your... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 1
132013 WRITING TASK: Do you think talking about our situations with... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 2
132012 How traveling helped me to overcome trauma ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 1847
132011 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 1
132010 What would you like to acquire in life? Why? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 1763
132009 Do you want to go back to being a child again? Why or why not? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 2588
132008 Homework ¾È*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 2659
132007 Practice identifying someone ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 1516
132006 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 2089
132005 27.Oct.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 1
132004 what do you enjoy doing on family gatherings? ½Å*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 1791
132003 Where do you usually meet new people? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 1562
132002 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 3379
132001 Survey ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-30 1
132000 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-29 1
131999 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-29 2
131998 HOMRWORK -231026 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-29 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04