¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework4

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÇÑ*¿µ
2024-02-05 1503

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I¡¯ve never thought that men and woman have different way of getting angry. But I think depending on personality, the way of their anger is different. Some people hold back anger, or some people, when they are angry and express their anger immediately.
I am very shy and afraid of express how I feel, because I am worried about people¡¯s feeling than mine. Even if I am in unfair situation, I usually hold back anger and try to act nothing happened. I try not to make me feel bad. Actually I just don¡¯t have the courage to fight against unfair. Sometimes even if it¡¯s me, I express anger. If the unfair situation is continued and it goes beyond what I can control, my anger explodes. So, people are surprised by me. I envy people who can control their feeling. Some people, if they get anger, they try to solve the problem rationally.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Your essay provides insightful reflections on how individuals handle anger based on their personalities. It's brave of you to acknowledge your own challenges in expressing anger and to recognize the courage needed to confront unfair situations.  Your honesty further adds depth to your writing.  Keep exploring and expressing your thoughts with such introspection! 
~T.Harmony <3

I¡¯ve never thought that men and woman have different way of getting angry. 
>> I've never thought that men and women have different ways of getting angry.
OR>> It never crossed my mind that men and women...

But I think depending on personality, the way of their anger is different. 
>> But I think depending on the personality, the way they get angry is different.

Some people hold back anger, or some people, when they are angry and express their anger immediately.
>> CORRECT!

I am very shy and afraid of express how I feel, because I am worried about people¡¯s feeling than mine. 
>> I am very shy and I'm afraid of expressing how I feel because I am more worried about people's feelings than mine.

Even if I am in unfair situation, I usually hold back anger and try to act nothing happened. 
>> Even if I am in an unfair situation, I usually hold back my anger and try to act like nothing happened.

I try not to make me feel bad. 
>> CORRECT!

Actually I just don¡¯t have the courage to fight against unfair. 
>> In all honesty, I just don't have the courage to fight against unfair people.

Sometimes even if it¡¯s me, I express anger.
>> CORRECT!

If the unfair situation is continued and it goes beyond what I can control, my anger explodes. 
>> ......, I explode in anger.

So, people are surprised by me. 
>> CORRECT!

I envy people who can control their feeling. 
>> I envy people who can control their emotions.

Some people, if they get anger, they try to solve the problem rationally.
>> Some people who feel anger try to rationally solve the problem.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132106 HOMEWORK -231101 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1
132105 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2343
132104 What is your favorite thing to do on social media? Explain why. ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1919
132103 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2
132102 homework 11.01 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2434
132101 I am half in favor of and half against the content of the... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2105
132100 I don\'t think I\'m going to ask questions because homeless... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2267
132099 Providing the things you need ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2964
132098 I think all movies are the best. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 3904
132097 Yes, the world\'s oceans are dangerous. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2582
132096 Pick your favorite food. Describe what you taste, smell, and... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2848
132095 Which one would you choose, live longer but suffer from more... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1
132094 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1769
132093 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°What is the... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 3
132092 Have you ever said ¡®no¡¯ when you really wanted to say ¡®yes¡¯? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1
132091 What musical instruments are unique to our country ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1990
132090 What are some food combinations that you would like to try? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1735
132089 WRITING TASK: What is your dream house? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 4
132088 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 3
132087 How different are you from best friend? ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04