¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Which do you prefer, watching TV or reading books?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2024-01-31 1595

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I was brought up in the educational backdrop which prefers reading books to watching TV. I even heard some people calling TV as a box for idiots, discouraging students from wasting time watching TV. However, recently many good TV programs have developed that are incomparable to the time of my childhood. So, we shouldn't be caught in the black and white approach when we think about TV programs for educational purposes. Rather, we try to utilize good TV programs such as documentaries to educate our children.
If I should select one of two, I would select reading books because our imagination can be prompted during reading books while watching TV doesn't contribute our mental development as much. The era to come will treasure those with imagination than those with lots of knowledge which is a dime a dozen on line. As always, reading letters and meanings between the line is also to be the groundwork for our culture to go further to next stage, and we can make the world better with it.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Steve, thank you for doing your composition. I enjoyed reading your work. Great job and keep it up. :)
T.JAMIE

I was brought up in the educational backdrop which prefers reading books to watching TV.

>>CORRECT
OR >> I was brought up in an educational backdrop that prefers reading books to watching TV.

OR>> I was brought up in an educational environment that preferred reading books over watching TV.


I even heard some people calling TV as a box for idiots, discouraging students from wasting time watching TV.

>>CORRECT
OR >> I even heard some people refer to TV as a 'box for idiots,' discouraging students from wasting time watching it.

OR>> I even heard some people refer to TV as a "box for idiots," discouraging students from wasting their time watching it.


However, recently many good TV programs have developed that are incomparable to the time of my childhood.

>>CORRECT
OR >> However, recently, many good TV programs have developed that are incomparable to those of my childhood.

OR>> However, in recent years, many good TV programs have emerged that are incomparable to what was available during my childhood.


So, we shouldn't be caught in the black and white approach when we think about TV programs for educational purposes.

>>CORRECT
OR >> So, we shouldn't be caught in a black-and-white approach when thinking about TV programs for educational purposes.

OR>> We shouldn't be caught up in a black-and-white approach when it comes to using TV programs for educational purposes.


Rather, we try to utilize good TV programs such as documentaries to educate our children.

>>CORRECT
OR >> Instead, we try to utilize good TV programs, such as documentaries, to educate our children.

OR>> Instead, we should try to utilize good TV programs, such as documentaries, to educate our children.


If I should select one of two, I would select reading books because our imagination can be prompted during reading books while watching TV doesn't contribute our mental development as much.

>>CORRECT
OR >> If I had to choose between the two, I would opt for reading books because our imagination can be stimulated while reading, whereas watching TV doesn't contribute as much to our mental development.

OR>> If I had to choose between the two, I would select reading books because they have the ability to prompt our imagination, whereas watching TV doesn't contribute to our mental development as much.


The era to come will treasure those with imagination than those with lots of knowledge which is a dime a dozen on line.

>>CORRECT
OR >> The era to come will value those with imagination more than those with lots of knowledge, which is a dime a dozen online.

OR>> In the era to come, those with imagination will be treasured more than those with a lot of knowledge, which is readily available online.


As always, reading letters and meanings between the line is also to be the groundwork for our culture to go further to next stage, and we can make the world better with it.

>>CORRECT

OR >> As always, reading letters and meanings between the lines is also the groundwork for our culture to advance to the next stage, and we can make the world better with it.

OR>> As always, reading between the lines and understanding the meanings behind the words is the foundation for our culture to progress to the next level, and we can make the world a better place by doing so.

 

 

 


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129614 5things ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 1
129613 homework 07.18 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 2694
129612 Home work ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 1
129611 The best time for me to sleep ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 2143
129610 Do you like shopping? Why or why not? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 4744
129609 What are some new features offered by streaming services that... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 5
129608 Writing Task 0717 À¯*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 0
129607 Home work ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 1
129606 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 2099
129605 2023.7.18 homework ±è*»è ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 2016
129604 What is your dream summer vacation? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 2384
129603 After natural disaster¡¦. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 2083
129602 Describe the worst trip you ever took. Where did you go? What... ¾ö*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 2641
129601 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 2330
129600 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 3417
129599 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 2376
129598 English ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 2277
129597 exercising ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 1
129596 Jake\'s wirting homework °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 2506
129595 The needed ability to be aircraft controller ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-18 2369

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04