¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Is it necessary for people to have a hobby? Why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*ºó
2024-01-29 1836

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

We need a hobby to improve our life. I mean human is going to do something constantly to avoid being sick of life. To make life more attractive, we need to refresh every certain period of time. In addition, having a hobby gives us a way to stress out. We have to release our stresses getting from work, relationship or something. If we didn¡¯t do that, we wouldn¡¯t stand for living in hard life. So, a hobby is one of the most important thing in our life. Try anything whatever you want.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for this Yoon!

We need a hobby to improve our life. 
>>  correct
>> OR: We need a hobby to improve our lives.
I mean human is going to do something constantly to avoid being sick of life. 
>>  I mean, humans need to do something constantly to avoid being sick of life. 
To make life more attractive, we need to refresh every certain period of time. 
>>  correct
>> OR: To make life more attractive, we need to do something refreshing every certain period of time. 
>> OR: To make life more attractive, we need to keep doing something new every certain period of time. 
In addition, having a hobby gives us a way to stress out. 
>> In addition, having a hobby gives us a way to relieve/release stress.
We have to release our stresses getting from work, relationship or something.
>>  We have to release our stresses taken/accumulated from work, relationship or something.
 If we didn¡¯t do that, we wouldn¡¯t stand for living in hard life. 
>>  If we didn¡¯t do that, we wouldn¡¯t stand living a hard life.  
So, a hobby is one of the most important things in our life. 
>>  correct
Try anything, whatever you want.
>>  correct
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130355 What\'s your favorite way to get to school? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2206
130354 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 0
130353 Who do you think is the most underrated actor/actress? Why? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2081
130352 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 0
130351 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1982
130350 When you are stressed and tired what do you do to relax? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2726
130349 What do students usually do in English camps? Do you think it\'s... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 0
130348 I think it\'s very important to communicate with people. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2628
130347 They don\'t complain about what they can understand. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2797
130346 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2019
130345 Do you think victims¡¯ families get a sense of closure knowing a... ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1
130344 8/7 homework °­*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 0
130343 Do you think backpacking is done only by those with little money? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1
130342 How bad is bullying in your country? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1
130341 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 3622
130340 What are you like when you are angry? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2
130339 What are the advantages of living in an apartment? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2139
130338 How do you feel about fusion food? Do you prefer traditional... ¼Û*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2896
130337 What mechanisms are necessary for people to go through in order... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 1752
130336 To develop my life ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-21 2743

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04