¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Talk about your Paju trip

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*Àº
2024-01-29 818

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I left home at 7:50 but I arrived Imjingak, Paju at 2pm I was so tired when I got there. Even in there, there were so many people and it was not fun than I expected. After 2hours, I started to go home. So I was in Imjingak for 2hours and 8-9hours on the street, bus and train. I was so tired. The only thing that I liked in this trip was the museum in Imjingak, which is about people who are abducted to north korea during Korean war. My Next trip will be after I buy my car.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Seong Eun!
Whoa! I'm sorry to know that you traveled for almost 8 hours. What happened? Did you get lost? Well, there is something that I always put in my mind, "CHARGE TO EXPERIENCE". When we feel bad about something, just consider it as part of your experience and be cautious or ready next time to avoid such things from happening again. 
Thanks for sharing.
T. Aki~


I left home at 7:50 but I arrived Imjingak, Paju at 2pm I was so tired when I got there.
>>> I left home at 7:50 but I arrived at Imjingak, Paju at 2 pm I was so tired when I got there.

Even in there, there were so many people and it was not fun than I expected.
>>>  There were so many people and it was not as fun as I expected.

After 2hours, I started to go home. So I was in Imjingak for 2hours and 8-9hours on the street, bus and train.
>>> After 2 hours, I started to go home. So I was in Imjingak for 2 hours and 8-9 hours on the street, bus, and train.

I was so tired.
>>> I was exhausted

The only thing that I liked in this trip was the museum in Imjingak, which is about people who are abducted to north korea during Korean war.
>>>The only thing that I liked on this trip was the museum in Imjingak, which is about people who were abducted to North Korea during the Korean war.

My Next trip will be after I buy my car.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139457 How do you respect the privacy of all the members of your family? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-26 428
139456 debt ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-26 1
139455 mind ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-26 0
139454 Can you name three jobs you can be good at? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-08-26 678
139453 homework ¹®*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-26 1
139452 Do you think being outgoing is important for career success? Why... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-26 431
139451 Plastic surgery ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-26 343
139450 What is the most expensive item you have purchased, and do you... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-26 715
139449 If you could go anywhere in the world right now, where would you... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-26 0
139448 What is the most popular song in your country right now? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-26 0
139447 Is anger ever a bad thing? If so, when? Why? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-26 0
139446 Who is your hero, and what do you like about them? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-26 0
139445 Page.58 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-25 445
139444 What are the disadvantages of upsizing your meal? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-25 1
139443 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-25 0
139442 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-25 2
139441 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-25 0
139440 What\'s your thought on your school election? Do you think class... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-25 593
139439 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-25 3
139438 Homework, ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-25 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04