¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Talk about your Paju trip

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*Àº
2024-01-29 1708

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I left home at 7:50 but I arrived Imjingak, Paju at 2pm I was so tired when I got there. Even in there, there were so many people and it was not fun than I expected. After 2hours, I started to go home. So I was in Imjingak for 2hours and 8-9hours on the street, bus and train. I was so tired. The only thing that I liked in this trip was the museum in Imjingak, which is about people who are abducted to north korea during Korean war. My Next trip will be after I buy my car.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Seong Eun!
Whoa! I'm sorry to know that you traveled for almost 8 hours. What happened? Did you get lost? Well, there is something that I always put in my mind, "CHARGE TO EXPERIENCE". When we feel bad about something, just consider it as part of your experience and be cautious or ready next time to avoid such things from happening again. 
Thanks for sharing.
T. Aki~


I left home at 7:50 but I arrived Imjingak, Paju at 2pm I was so tired when I got there.
>>> I left home at 7:50 but I arrived at Imjingak, Paju at 2 pm I was so tired when I got there.

Even in there, there were so many people and it was not fun than I expected.
>>>  There were so many people and it was not as fun as I expected.

After 2hours, I started to go home. So I was in Imjingak for 2hours and 8-9hours on the street, bus and train.
>>> After 2 hours, I started to go home. So I was in Imjingak for 2 hours and 8-9 hours on the street, bus, and train.

I was so tired.
>>> I was exhausted

The only thing that I liked in this trip was the museum in Imjingak, which is about people who are abducted to north korea during Korean war.
>>>The only thing that I liked on this trip was the museum in Imjingak, which is about people who were abducted to North Korea during the Korean war.

My Next trip will be after I buy my car.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139364 What is the most important lesson in life that you have learned? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-22 1157
139363 if you cook breakfast, do you cook for your whole family ?, or... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-22 1615
139362 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-22 1415
139361 vaccination ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-22 1230
139360 Married couple\'s argument ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-22 6
139359 Imagine a day in the life of a character who has the power to... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 889
139358 About my dream house ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 1092
139357 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 1
139356 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 1514
139355 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 2
139354 How can reading benefit you? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 1088
139353 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 1
139352 How often do you have big family get-togethers? hat happens... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 1039
139351 Do you like spending time at home? ±Ç*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 1122
139350 Do you sometimes compete with your friends? In what way? Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 1164
139349 How can students become smart? ÃÖ*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 1141
139348 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 1241
139347 Can you share any interesting stories or memorable experiences... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 985
139346 schedule ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 1
139345 What are some healthy habits you try to maintain in your daily... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-08-21 769

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04