¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Would you rather be rich and unhappy or poor and happy?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*ÈÆ
2024-01-26 638

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I choose that be poor and happy. Recently, I saw a lot of rich people who feel unhappy. So, they usually commit or fell into the wrong way. I think happiness is the driving force to get power to do something and also It can give a challenge to try everything. Although, we fail doing something, happiness can give the power to rise again. Despite they get lots of money, they are thinking about aren't happy, that's a big problem of the life. Money can give many chance to do but It can't give happiness. So, the poor people who feel happy has the biggest power more than rich people. Actually, the reason why do we gather the money is for be happy. Thus, I choose 'poor and happy'. (Sorry, I can't write 10 sentences...I did best one can 😢)

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hey Sarah! You did a great job! You were worried that you weren't able to make 10 sentences but you actually did, so job well done! I agree with your answer, happiness is more important than money. I', looking forward to your next writing task! Have a great weekend!^^

~~~Teacher Ryka^^


I choose that be poor and happy. 
>>> I choose to be poor and happy.

Recently, I saw a lot of rich people who feel unhappy. 
>>> Recently, I've seen a lot of rich people who are unhappy.

So, they usually commit or fell into the wrong way. 
>>> So, they usually fall on to the wrong things.

I think happiness is the driving force to get power to do something and also It can give a challenge to try everything. 
>>> I think happiness is the driving force to motivate and challenge someone to do or start something.

Although, we fail doing something, happiness can give the power to rise again. 
>>> Although we fail, happiness can motivate us to rise again.

Despite they get lots of money, they are thinking about aren't happy, that's a big problem of the life. 
>>> Despite having lots of money, they feel unhappy which is a big problem in life.

Money can give many chance to do but It can't give happiness. 
>>> Money can give you opportunities but it can't give happiness.

So, the poor people who feel happy has the biggest power more than rich people. 
>>> So, poor people who are happy have the advantage over the rich people.

Actually, the reason why do we gather the money is for be happy. 
>>> Actually, the reason why we earn money is for us to be happy.

Thus, I choose 'poor and happy'. 
>>> Thus, I choose to be "poor and happy."
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135174 Environment ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-03 0
135173 Pets and plants ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-03 0
135172 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-03 1000
135171 What body language in your country is used to show respect? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-03 1
135170 11 page ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-03 3
135169 Homework ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-03 1156
135168 Movie ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-03 0
135167 Changes ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-03 0
135166 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-03 771
135165 why is English fluency significant for you? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-03 2
135164 HOMEWORK FOR 02.29.2024 WRITING TASK: What change do you want to... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-03 3
135163 Do you like any foreign celebrities? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-03-03 5
135162 It depends on my future ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-02 1
135161 With angry people, we cannot solve anything ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-02 0
135160 Customers are not so right ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-02 1
135159 I am happy when... ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-02 0
135158 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-02 3
135157 0301 assignment ÃÖ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-02 1760
135156 Do you prefer guided tours or exploring on your own? Why? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-03-02 1448
135155 homework ÀÌ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-02 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04