¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 01.23

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-01-23 558

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the pros and cons of living in another city?

It's not easy to leave our hometown and living in another city.
Aside from the negative cases, the big reason for moving is get a job, study, and easy access.
This means that if I move to a city from outskirts of the city, I want to a better infrastructure than before lived.
On the other way, some people cases where they go a quiet and airy countryside.
To sum it up, I think the pros of living is self-satisfaction.
But, I think the cons of living in another city is that we don't know well the downside until we experience it ourselves.
For example, some people moved because wanted more comfortable life than where before they lived, but there are people who feel uncomfortable.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the pros and cons of living in another city?


It's not easy to leave our hometown and living in another city.
>> It's not easy to leave our hometown to live in another city.
Aside from the negative cases, the big reason for moving is get a job, study, and easy access.
>> Aside from the negative cases, the big reason for moving is to get a job, to study, and to have an easy access.
This means that if I move to a city from outskirts of the city, I want to a better infrastructure than before lived.
>> This means that if I move to a city from the outskirts of the city, I want to live in a better infrastructure than where I lived before.
On the other way, some people cases where they go a quiet and airy countryside.
>> On the other way, in some people's cases, they go to a quiet and airy place in the countryside.
To sum it up, I think the pros of living is self-satisfaction.
>> To sum it up, I think the pros of living in another city is self-satisfaction.
But, I think the cons of living in another city is that we don't know well the downside until we experience it ourselves.
>> CORRECT!
For example, some people moved because wanted more comfortable life than where before they lived, but there are people who feel uncomfortable.
>> For example, some people moved because they wanted to have a more comfortable life than where before they lived, but there are people who feel uncomfortable.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129378 Today\'s my homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1404
129377 What is my favorite food? ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 2470
129376 Do you think historical movies are important to be watched? Why? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1
129375 Should a person get plastic surgery to make themselves have a... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1989
129374 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 0
129373 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1437
129372 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 0
129371 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 0
129370 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 0
129369 HOMEWORK FOR 05/15 Á¶*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1
129368 WRITING TASK: What would you like to share about Korea that most... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 4
129367 HOMEWORK FOR 05/12 Á¶*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1
129366 Homework ¼Û*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1406
129365 Do you think people who exercise are happier than those who... ¹Ý* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 2124
129364 7.7.Fri Ȳ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1358
129363 7.6.Thu Ȳ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 988
129362 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 2392
129361 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1534
129360 What do you think is the biggest change in how families are in... Àå*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1720
129359 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-07-07 1105

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04