¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 01.23

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2024-01-23 290

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the pros and cons of living in another city?

It's not easy to leave our hometown and living in another city.
Aside from the negative cases, the big reason for moving is get a job, study, and easy access.
This means that if I move to a city from outskirts of the city, I want to a better infrastructure than before lived.
On the other way, some people cases where they go a quiet and airy countryside.
To sum it up, I think the pros of living is self-satisfaction.
But, I think the cons of living in another city is that we don't know well the downside until we experience it ourselves.
For example, some people moved because wanted more comfortable life than where before they lived, but there are people who feel uncomfortable.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the pros and cons of living in another city?


It's not easy to leave our hometown and living in another city.
>> It's not easy to leave our hometown to live in another city.
Aside from the negative cases, the big reason for moving is get a job, study, and easy access.
>> Aside from the negative cases, the big reason for moving is to get a job, to study, and to have an easy access.
This means that if I move to a city from outskirts of the city, I want to a better infrastructure than before lived.
>> This means that if I move to a city from the outskirts of the city, I want to live in a better infrastructure than where I lived before.
On the other way, some people cases where they go a quiet and airy countryside.
>> On the other way, in some people's cases, they go to a quiet and airy place in the countryside.
To sum it up, I think the pros of living is self-satisfaction.
>> To sum it up, I think the pros of living in another city is self-satisfaction.
But, I think the cons of living in another city is that we don't know well the downside until we experience it ourselves.
>> CORRECT!
For example, some people moved because wanted more comfortable life than where before they lived, but there are people who feel uncomfortable.
>> For example, some people moved because they wanted to have a more comfortable life than where before they lived, but there are people who feel uncomfortable.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134841 What will be your plan, if you will not be spending your big... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 414
134840 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 392
134839 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 0
134838 homework 02.20 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 214
134837 I think Son Heung Min is succes person. ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 3
134836 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 0
134835 My dinner ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 463
134834 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 548
134833 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 3
134832 Difficulties in life ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 4
134831 Describe a place you find peaceful and why it\'s special to you. ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 542
134830 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 489
134829 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 1
134828 Survey ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 1
134827 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 1
134826 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 251
134825 Children can achieve anything if they try hard enough. ÀÓ*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 387
134824 About Korea society °í*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 283
134823 My daily routine °­*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 365
134822 Do you ever worry about the safety of the rides at the amusement... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-20 265

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04