¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

sns

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2024-01-23 374

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

We need break away trom social media.

SNS seems to be connected each other, But in reality our life disconnect owing to sns.

It causes more negative effects to us especially young gengration.

It is making us dopamine addict.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Ms. Lily!
I would have to agree with you. Social media creates a gap between people that the other person has a higher status. 
Thank you for this1
T. Aki~

We need break away trom social media.
>>> We need to get away from social media.

SNS seems to be connected each other, But in reality our life disconnect owing to sns.
>>>SNS seems to connect people, but in reality, our life disconnects owing to SNS.

It causes more negative effects to us especially young gengration.
>>> It causes more negative effects on us, especially the young generation.

It is making us dopamine addict.
>>> It is making us addicted to dopamine.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133243 Do you enjoy family reunions? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 4
133242 Why a driver become reckless °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 1
133241 Hoework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-15 652
133240 Skin color ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 513
133239 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 2
133238 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 1
133237 What do you do at night that is different from during the day? Àü*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 2
133236 IELTS TASK2(1) body2 and conclusion ÃÖ*¸ù ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 468
133235 IELTS TASK2(1) introduce and body1 ÃÖ*¸ù ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 529
133234 IELTS TASK1 ÃÖ*¸ù ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 1
133233 What toys did you really like when you were little, and why do... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 0
133232 homework 12.14 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 541
133231 Would you rather sleep late every day or get up early every... ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 494
133230 What\'s your thought on having 3 days of weekend and 4 weekdays? ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 1
133229 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 1626
133228 What can people do to stop cyber-bullying? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 4
133227 How to be good at drawing? Provide at least three sentences... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 0
133226 Do you think being a professional dancer would be a good job? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 2
133225 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"What would you... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 0
133224 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04