¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

An incident that changed my life/belief.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*ȯ
2024-01-19 525

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I enjoyed talking about the cane from my mother last morning.
Actually, I wasn't able to understand you what the flying racket is.
You understood it as a electric racket. But it might be dangerous to hit someone ^^
I will show you the photo someday.

An incident that changed my life/belief.
I had incident that changed my belief and mind a year ago.
That is the reading books.
Everyone knows reading books is really helpful for our life and any fields.
However a few people like to do because it can be the hassle.
I realized I can be ranked within top 10% in various fields if I read books.
So I could find out how the rich live and what habits they have by reading books.
It made me challenge the certificate of hotel management again and eventually I made it.
The rich always make a goal and tried to make it.
Now I am reading a book about the stock.
My goal is wining more than 20 logo contests this year and the money should be invested for the stock.
It is the incident that changed my life.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Han!
While writing this, please know that it is already my day... Hahahaha! By the way, I enjoyed reading your answer today because I could feel that you are really eager to improve yourself! It is inspiring!!!~ Your hard work and determination will pay off :D
-Chammy
I enjoyed talking about the cane from my mother last morning.
>>Correct
Actually, I wasn't able to understand you what the flying racket is.
>>Actually, I wasn't able to understand what the flying racket is.
You understood it as a electric racket. But it might be dangerous to hit someone ^^
>>You understood it as an electric racket. But it might be dangerous to hit someone ^^
I will show you the photo someday.
An incident that changed my life/belief.
>>Correct
I had incident that changed my belief and mind a year ago.
>>I had an incident that changed my belief and mind a year ago.
That is the reading books.
>>That is reading books.
Everyone knows reading books is really helpful for our life and any fields.
>>Correct
However a few people like to do because it can be the hassle.
>>However a few people like don't to do it because it can be a hassle
I realized I can be ranked within top 10% in various fields if I read books.
>>I realized I could be ranked within the top 10% in various fields if I read books.
So I could find out how the rich live and what habits they have by reading books.
It made me challenge the certificate of hotel management again and eventually, I made it.
>>Correct
The rich always make a goal and tried to make it.
>>The rich always make a goal and try to make it.
Now I am reading a book about the stock.
>>Correct
My goal is wining more than 20 logo contests this year and the money should be invested for the stock.
>>My goal is to win more than 20 logo contests this year and the money should be invested in stocks.
It is the incident that changed my life.
>>Correct
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
136901 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 1
136900 What problems do you encounter when you are not truthful? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 561
136899 About my future ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 604
136898 How do you feel if people gossip about you? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 533
136897 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 661
136896 2024.05.01 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 615
136895 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 217
136894 Homework ¼Û*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 552
136893 What decade has produced the best music? ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 554
136892 control ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 1
136891 Home ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 0
136890 Home ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 0
136889 Home ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 0
136888 HW ³ª*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 450
136887 What kinds of jobs interest you most and least? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 511
136886 HOMEWORK FOR 05.02.2024 WRITING TASK: Can you be angry without... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 4
136885 Real estate is the most beautiful property. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 580
136884 It\'s very difficult to help at no cost. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 520
136883 I don\'t respect anyone. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 770
136882 How does the government respond to and manage wildfires? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-05-02 427

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04