¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àå*Çõ
2024-01-03 422

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I agree in Sally`s opinion because junk food is bad for student`s health and if the student eat junk food they will want to eat junk food more.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Henry! ^^ 
I'm glad you figured it out. ^^ By the way, you have a strong opinion here. You also explained your point, and I think that's great. For more practice, try to express your ideas in at least three to five sentences next time. For now, this is great. Please study my correction below. See you again in class!
~ Teacher Maxine 

I agree in Sally`s opinion because junk food is bad for student`s health and if the student eat junk food they will want to eat junk food more.

>> I agree with Sally's opinion because junk food is bad for students' health, and if students eat junk food, they will likely develop a craving for more unhealthy food.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132182 How can you protect yourself from dangers abroad? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-04 1271
132181 Why is financial stability important? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-04 1570
132180 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-04 7
132179 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-04 1142
132178 Survey ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-04 1
132177 What do you think the differences are between male and female... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-04 1
132176 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°Do you believe... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-04 0
132175 Do you think money can buy happiness, or do you believe in the... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-11-04 1934
132174 Are there any beautiful mountains in your country? Describe them. ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 1541
132173 Where do you live? ÀÌ*¹«¿¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 934
132172 What advice would you give to someone who wants to improve... ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 0
132171 If you were a parent, would you start transferring your... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 2
132170 homework ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 963
132169 The best time for me to spend time ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 1566
132168 Which cartoon character would you be and why?ᩚ ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 1035
132167 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 0
132166 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 0
132165 What is your favorite public transportation? ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 1
132164 A beautiful mountain in my country. ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 734
132163 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 850

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04