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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Homework

작성자: 김*우
2023-12-25 1089

회원님의 영작문

Hi.
Merry Christmas.
Yesterday, there was a concert of children in the church.
Many childeren including my daughters sang and danced.
Of course, all musics were about the birth of Jesus.
In fact, there was a problem at the clinic yesterday.
A rude woman who wanted to get much money visited and interfered with our work.
She is her whom I said before.
To avoid a serious violence, I let Dr.MJ and the related counselling manager escape from her.
She tried to contact us to record some sentences that she needed, but I ordered my staffs to say nothing.
She left after three hours, so I stayed at the clinic for a long time than expected.
Anyway, I could attend the worship and see my kids sing and dance.
Today, after the worship, we played with the snow for a moment.
And, we played Nintendo.
Since Santa Claus gave many board games for gifts to my kids, we also played those things together.
The most important property to me is my clinic because it's value is highest among my properties.
See you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Dr. Kim!

A very merry and warm Christmas to you too and your family! My son and I watched 'Home Alone 2"  the day before Christmas and yesterday, my sisters and I got a full body massage. There were a lot of eating too in betwee.

Just like the movie Home Alone, there was a scene where Kevin was singing a Christmas carol there and I imagine that your daughters have done quite the same. You must be proud of their very cute performance! 

Now, I am not sure how you will handle the case of the lady asking for too much money. I guess, you should also have your CCTV ready in case you might need it in court. I guess she is very assertive of getting that big amount and you have to be ready on her next steps. On your part, I think that you have managed the situation appropriately. It must be infuriating seeing her for several hours in the clinic. That moment was awkward, I suppose..

Thank God, you have your family to go home to not only on Christmas but everyday. Imagine going home alone after a bad day- that life must feel empty and meaningless. So, always be successful in your clinic no matter how hard it may be with some patients and clients because you have all the best reasons to go back home.

Visit the grammar suggestions carefully. Well done!

I will see you in class soon.

-T. Donna~

Hi.
>> Correct!

Merry Christmas.
>> Correct!

Yesterday, there was a concert of children in the church.
>> Correct!

Many childeren including my daughters sang and danced.
>> Correct!

Of course, all musics were about the birth of Jesus.
>> music

In fact, there was a problem at the clinic yesterday.
>> Correct!
Or: Meanwhile, there was a problem at the clinic yesterday.

A rude woman who wanted to get much money visited and interfered with our work.
>> Correct!

She is her whom I said before.
>> She is her whom I mentioned before.

To avoid a serious violence, I let Dr.MJ and the related counselling manager escape from her.
>> Correct!

She tried to contact us to record some sentences that she needed, but I ordered my staffs to say nothing.
>> Correct!
Or: staff

She left after three hours, so I stayed at the clinic for a long time than expected.
>> Correct!

Anyway, I could attend the worship and see my kids sing and dance.
>> Correct!

Today, after the worship, we played with the snow for a moment.
>> Correct!

And, we played Nintendo.
>> Correct!

Since Santa Claus gave many board games for gifts to my kids, we also played those things together.
>> Correct!

The most important property to me is my clinic because it's value is highest among my properties.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
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133240 Skin color 이*규 완료 2023-12-14 303
133239 Homework 김*서 완료 2023-12-14 2
133238 Homework 장*희 완료 2023-12-14 1
133237 What do you do at night that is different from during the day? 전*정 완료 2023-12-14 2
133236 IELTS TASK2(1) body2 and conclusion 최*몽 완료 2023-12-14 259
133235 IELTS TASK2(1) introduce and body1 최*몽 완료 2023-12-14 248
133234 IELTS TASK1 최*몽 완료 2023-12-14 1
133233 What toys did you really like when you were little, and why do... 윤*원 완료 2023-12-14 0
133232 homework 12.14 최*� 완료 2023-12-14 265
133231 Would you rather sleep late every day or get up early every... 송*우 완료 2023-12-14 226
133230 What\'s your thought on having 3 days of weekend and 4 weekdays? 오*혁 완료 2023-12-14 1
133229 Homework 김*숙 완료 2023-12-14 1327
133228 What can people do to stop cyber-bullying? 에*미 완료 2023-12-14 4
133227 How to be good at drawing? Provide at least three sentences... 임*호 완료 2023-12-14 0
133226 Do you think being a professional dancer would be a good job? 에*미 완료 2023-12-14 2
133225 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"What would you... 앨* 완료 2023-12-14 0
133224 Homework 김*서 완료 2023-12-14 0

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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
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04

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