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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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Homework

작성자: 김*우
2023-12-20 354

회원님의 영작문

Hi.
As I told you, I went to a car center, where the engineer checked my car, and of course, my car proved to be healthy.
After the check, my wife and I went to a restaurant and we enjoyed brunch there.
This was the first time to go there.
There were plenty of american style foods there and the taste of all food that we ordered was so good than expected.
I felt like I was in New York.
This afternoon, I attended the guitar class, and did workout with my friend as my routines.
I was so happy to get praise from the teacher in the class.
After workout, my friend and I went to a new restaurant, where we ate a kind of beef soup, and it also tasted so good.
As for my assignment, many cancers are easy to cure these days.
For instance, thyroid cancer and early stage stomach or colon cancer are belonged to those cancers.
If we have other cancer excepting those things above and can detect early, we don't have to be afraid because most of cancers excepting pancreatic cancer can be cured.
See you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Dr. Kim!

You had a very busy but relaxing day off yesterday. I guess, you have done all the things that you love including eating all the food you deserve. After all, a day off can help reset yourself mentally, and make it easier to have a clear head once back at work. Put simply, push yourself through too many hours or days of work and your brain starts to push back.

Meanwhile playing guitar can help you develop important social skills, such as communication and teamwork. Perhaps you should influence Dr. MJ to play an instrument too.  Congratulations on your guitar skills. I cannot wait to see you play the guitar while rendering a song.

Lastly, I never thought that the pancreas is the most delicate organ in terms of cancer. As I read it on the Internet, to keep your pancreas healthy, focus on foods that are rich in protein, limit the use of fatty foods and follow a healthy lifestyle. 

I am glad to see minimal mistakes on your composition. Maintain your correct sentences and always take note of the grammar suggestions. Excellent job!

See you tomorrow!

-T. Donna~ 

Hi.
>> Correct!

As I told you, I went to a car center, where the engineer checked my car, and of course, my car proved to be healthy.
>> Correct!

After the check, my wife and I went to a restaurant and we enjoyed brunch there.
>> Correct!

This was the first time to go there.
>> Correct!

There were plenty of american style foods there and the taste of all food that we ordered was so good than expected.
>> Correct!
Or: There were plenty of American style food there and the taste of all food that we ordered was so good than expected.

I felt like I was in New York.
>> Correct!

This afternoon, I attended the guitar class, and did workout with my friend as my routines.
>> Correct!

I was so happy to get praise from the teacher in the class.
>> I was so happy to get praises from the teacher in the class.

After workout, my friend and I went to a new restaurant, where we ate a kind of beef soup, and it also tasted so good.
>> Correct!

As for my assignment, many cancers are easy to cure these days.
>> Correct!

For instance, thyroid cancer and early stage stomach or colon cancer are belonged to those cancers.
>> For instance, thyroid cancer and early stage stomach or colon cancer belong to those cancers.

If we have other cancer excepting those things above and can detect early, we don't have to be afraid because most of cancers excepting pancreatic cancer can be cured.
>> If we have other cancer aside from those things above and can detect early, we don't have to be afraid because most of cancers except pancreatic cancer can be cured.

See you. 
>> Correct!
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