¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-12-20 1658

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi.
As I told you, I went to a car center, where the engineer checked my car, and of course, my car proved to be healthy.
After the check, my wife and I went to a restaurant and we enjoyed brunch there.
This was the first time to go there.
There were plenty of american style foods there and the taste of all food that we ordered was so good than expected.
I felt like I was in New York.
This afternoon, I attended the guitar class, and did workout with my friend as my routines.
I was so happy to get praise from the teacher in the class.
After workout, my friend and I went to a new restaurant, where we ate a kind of beef soup, and it also tasted so good.
As for my assignment, many cancers are easy to cure these days.
For instance, thyroid cancer and early stage stomach or colon cancer are belonged to those cancers.
If we have other cancer excepting those things above and can detect early, we don't have to be afraid because most of cancers excepting pancreatic cancer can be cured.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Dr. Kim!

You had a very busy but relaxing day off yesterday. I guess, you have done all the things that you love including eating all the food you deserve. After all, a day off can help reset yourself mentally, and make it easier to have a clear head once back at work. Put simply, push yourself through too many hours or days of work and your brain starts to push back.

Meanwhile playing guitar can help you develop important social skills, such as communication and teamwork. Perhaps you should influence Dr. MJ to play an instrument too.  Congratulations on your guitar skills. I cannot wait to see you play the guitar while rendering a song.

Lastly, I never thought that the pancreas is the most delicate organ in terms of cancer. As I read it on the Internet, to keep your pancreas healthy, focus on foods that are rich in protein, limit the use of fatty foods and follow a healthy lifestyle. 

I am glad to see minimal mistakes on your composition. Maintain your correct sentences and always take note of the grammar suggestions. Excellent job!

See you tomorrow!

-T. Donna~ 

Hi.
>> Correct!

As I told you, I went to a car center, where the engineer checked my car, and of course, my car proved to be healthy.
>> Correct!

After the check, my wife and I went to a restaurant and we enjoyed brunch there.
>> Correct!

This was the first time to go there.
>> Correct!

There were plenty of american style foods there and the taste of all food that we ordered was so good than expected.
>> Correct!
Or: There were plenty of American style food there and the taste of all food that we ordered was so good than expected.

I felt like I was in New York.
>> Correct!

This afternoon, I attended the guitar class, and did workout with my friend as my routines.
>> Correct!

I was so happy to get praise from the teacher in the class.
>> I was so happy to get praises from the teacher in the class.

After workout, my friend and I went to a new restaurant, where we ate a kind of beef soup, and it also tasted so good.
>> Correct!

As for my assignment, many cancers are easy to cure these days.
>> Correct!

For instance, thyroid cancer and early stage stomach or colon cancer are belonged to those cancers.
>> For instance, thyroid cancer and early stage stomach or colon cancer belong to those cancers.

If we have other cancer excepting those things above and can detect early, we don't have to be afraid because most of cancers excepting pancreatic cancer can be cured.
>> If we have other cancer aside from those things above and can detect early, we don't have to be afraid because most of cancers except pancreatic cancer can be cured.

See you. 
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138158 2024.06.28 ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 0
138157 >> What are your thoughts on women going on a diet? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1
138156 Is it common to have friendships across generations? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1035
138155 What do you consider to be your good and bad qualities? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1069
138154 What country has the most interesting culture? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1046
138153 What are the advantages and disadvantages of living in the... ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1994
138152 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 0
138151 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1211
138150 Q) What is your father¡¯s quality that you admire the most? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 2
138149 Do you believe that people are more honest with friends or with... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1062
138148 What¡¯s your favorite song? Why do you like it? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1
138147 Are there some things that you would like to change in the... ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1
138146 2024.06.27 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1523
138145 Who are some famous figure skaters from history, and what made... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1734
138144 HOMEWORK Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1038
138143 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 1885
138142 During summer vacation ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 2
138141 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-28 0
138140 How does jealousy affect people? Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-06-27 1968
138139 What do you think is the best painting in the world? Why? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-27 1148

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04