¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-12-20 1732

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi.
As I told you, I went to a car center, where the engineer checked my car, and of course, my car proved to be healthy.
After the check, my wife and I went to a restaurant and we enjoyed brunch there.
This was the first time to go there.
There were plenty of american style foods there and the taste of all food that we ordered was so good than expected.
I felt like I was in New York.
This afternoon, I attended the guitar class, and did workout with my friend as my routines.
I was so happy to get praise from the teacher in the class.
After workout, my friend and I went to a new restaurant, where we ate a kind of beef soup, and it also tasted so good.
As for my assignment, many cancers are easy to cure these days.
For instance, thyroid cancer and early stage stomach or colon cancer are belonged to those cancers.
If we have other cancer excepting those things above and can detect early, we don't have to be afraid because most of cancers excepting pancreatic cancer can be cured.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Dr. Kim!

You had a very busy but relaxing day off yesterday. I guess, you have done all the things that you love including eating all the food you deserve. After all, a day off can help reset yourself mentally, and make it easier to have a clear head once back at work. Put simply, push yourself through too many hours or days of work and your brain starts to push back.

Meanwhile playing guitar can help you develop important social skills, such as communication and teamwork. Perhaps you should influence Dr. MJ to play an instrument too.  Congratulations on your guitar skills. I cannot wait to see you play the guitar while rendering a song.

Lastly, I never thought that the pancreas is the most delicate organ in terms of cancer. As I read it on the Internet, to keep your pancreas healthy, focus on foods that are rich in protein, limit the use of fatty foods and follow a healthy lifestyle. 

I am glad to see minimal mistakes on your composition. Maintain your correct sentences and always take note of the grammar suggestions. Excellent job!

See you tomorrow!

-T. Donna~ 

Hi.
>> Correct!

As I told you, I went to a car center, where the engineer checked my car, and of course, my car proved to be healthy.
>> Correct!

After the check, my wife and I went to a restaurant and we enjoyed brunch there.
>> Correct!

This was the first time to go there.
>> Correct!

There were plenty of american style foods there and the taste of all food that we ordered was so good than expected.
>> Correct!
Or: There were plenty of American style food there and the taste of all food that we ordered was so good than expected.

I felt like I was in New York.
>> Correct!

This afternoon, I attended the guitar class, and did workout with my friend as my routines.
>> Correct!

I was so happy to get praise from the teacher in the class.
>> I was so happy to get praises from the teacher in the class.

After workout, my friend and I went to a new restaurant, where we ate a kind of beef soup, and it also tasted so good.
>> Correct!

As for my assignment, many cancers are easy to cure these days.
>> Correct!

For instance, thyroid cancer and early stage stomach or colon cancer are belonged to those cancers.
>> For instance, thyroid cancer and early stage stomach or colon cancer belong to those cancers.

If we have other cancer excepting those things above and can detect early, we don't have to be afraid because most of cancers excepting pancreatic cancer can be cured.
>> If we have other cancer aside from those things above and can detect early, we don't have to be afraid because most of cancers except pancreatic cancer can be cured.

See you. 
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
139674 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 4
139673 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1054
139672 What things did you often trade when you were a child? Who did... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1671
139671 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1137
139670 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1
139669 Are you generally a positive person or a negative person? ¹Ú*½Ä ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1126
139668 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1
139667 Which part of your childhood do you wish you could change? Why? ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1115
139666 If you could design your own park, what would you put in it? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1122
139665 Homwork ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 0
139664 homework ·ù*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1094
139663 What do you think about children crying in a restaurant when you... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1150
139662 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1139
139661 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 0
139660 Relaxing ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1113
139659 9/3(Tue) homework ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 1003
139658 sick and tired of ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 0
139657 mistake ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 0
139656 september ÀÌ*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 2
139655 HOMEWORK FOR 09.02.2024 WRITING TASK: What are you most excited... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-09-03 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04