¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

BUSAN

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-12-20 942

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If the youth prefer to Busan, it is a very glad news and signs for us.

In Korea, too many populations dense in the few metro cities serously, itself means the imbalance of country.

Urban imbalances are related to many parts which are industry, housing, employment and infrastructure of life etc.

This make the rich-get-richer and the poor-get-poorer cycle.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Ms. Lily!
This is a piece of good news for your country that not all people complain about how difficult life is.
Let's talk about it later. see you!
Aki~

If the youth prefer to Busan, it is a very glad news and signs for us.
>>> If the youth prefer Busan, it is very good news and signs for us.

In Korea, too many populations dense in the few metro cities serously, itself means the imbalance of country.
>>> In Korea, too much population in the few metro cities seriously imbalanced the country.

Urban imbalances are related to many parts which are industry, housing, employment, infrastructure of life, etc.
>>> CORRECT!

This makes the rich-get-richer and the poor-get-poorer cycle.
>>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131860 HOMEWORK _1 ¼Û*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1340
131859 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1
131858 ¡°Half of writing history is hiding the truth.¡± What do you... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2
131857 homework 10.23 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1501
131856 homework_231023 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1949
131855 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 0
131854 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2
131853 Homework ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1
131852 Where do you see yourself in 5 years? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1687
131851 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°What are the... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2
131850 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2
131849 What are the toughest jobs in the world? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1605
131848 > Do you agree that hand written letters are considered more... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2464
131847 What are some alternative ways to enjoy Halloween or other big... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1
131846 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 0
131845 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 0
131844 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1696
131843 WRITING TASK: Why is \'planning\' important? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 4
131842 A role model ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2497
131841 Myeongseongsan ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1565

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04