¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

superaged

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-12-15 338

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that the superaged society will drop social production ability.

The government should focus on the welfare and safty of the senior than challengable policies.

The young generation should be burden the senior's pention even they don't want to do.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Ms. Lily, it's a great day today!

I completely agree with your opinion that the government should prioritize the needs of the people. By doing so, it could help address the issue of low birth rates and other social problems. Sometimes, the government creates policies that they believe will benefit everyone, but in reality, it only serves to increase their popularity. 
Best regards, 
Aki.


I think that the superaged society will drop social production ability.
>>> CORRECT!

The government should focus on the welfare and safty of the senior than challengable policies.
>>> The government should focus on the welfare and safety of the seniors rather than challenging policies.

The young generation should be burden the senior's pention even they don't want to do.
>>> The young generation should burden the senior's pension even if they don't want to do it.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133203 If you were given a chance what would you choose, to change... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-14 1
133202 When do you prefer having a family gathering? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 330
133201 Would you like to live in your hometown forever? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 0
133200 What do you think is the most important thing in life? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 0
133199 The things that I appreciate. ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 0
133198 What are the advantages of having a routine or schedule? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 425
133197 homework 12.13 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 420
133196 Holiday ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 3
133195 I would rather live in a tree house ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 459
133194 Vice ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 1
133193 What do you think of employee relocation? Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 440
133192 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 414
133191 Studying grammar and practicing conversation skills ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 509
133190 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 519
133189 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Are you... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 1
133188 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 0
133187 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 0
133186 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 375
133185 Do you like keeping a diary? What do you want to write about? ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 334
133184 Do you think it\'s okay to drink rainwater? Why or why not? ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-12-13 326

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04