¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-12-10 1037

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi, there.
How is it going?
Since the profit was decreased these days, Dr.MJ introduced a new system.
Dr.MJ decided to check all processes that include staff management, advertisement, client counselling, and so on.
Of course, my workload also became larger.
I took on the morning conference, and I saw more patients during Dr.MJ's meeting with staff many times a day.
It's alright to me, but I am so worried about the excessive stress of our staff.
After Dr.MJ scolded staff managers, many of them cried.
I wish this storm will pass quickly.
If the profit will be recovered, all problems will be solved naturally, I am sure.
As for my assignment, yes, I joined several singing competitions long times ago.
I won the first on a small contest.
Despite it was a small size and had a low level typically, I was so happy for it.
As I told you, I will sing and playing the guitar outside someday.
I enjoy doing something in front of many people.
I think I was born to be a person like that.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Dr. Kim!

Today is still smooth as of the start of Monday. How is your profit today? You have never been more profit conscious before. I guess Dr. MJ is doing a good job in making everyone play their A-game.

Without the hardest times, the best lessons will not be learned. Think of them as blessings in disguise. Tough times need tough people.

Of course, this would not be easy so, to everyone who cannot stand the storm better leave soon. It may sound cruel but that is the way life works- it is survival of the fittest. After the storm, the sun will shine again and you and Dr. MJ will be okay as well as the rest of your staff.

One good thing is that you have music in you. When I am pressured or stressed, I play good music to soothe me and it feels better. 

I hope that your dream of performing will come true soon. Then, you can also earn money from that talent. It would be awesome. 

Thank you for this composition! You used new and correct expressions and they surely add up to the beauty of your work. Keep up the excellent job!

See you later.

-T. Donna~

Hi, there.
>> Correct!

How is it going?
>> Correct!

Since the profit was decreased these days, Dr.MJ introduced a new system.
>> Since the profit decreased these days, Dr.MJ introduced a new system.

Dr.MJ decided to check all processes that include staff management, advertisement, client counselling, and so on.
>> Correct!

Of course, my workload also became larger.
>> Correct!

I took on the morning conference, and I saw more patients during Dr.MJ's meeting with staff many times a day.
>> I took on the morning conference, and I saw more patients during Dr.MJ's meeting with the staff many times a day.

It's alright to me, but I am so worried about the excessive stress of our staff.
>> It's alright with me, but I am so worried about the excessive stress of our staff.

After Dr.MJ scolded staff managers, many of them cried.
>> Correct!

I wish this storm will pass quickly.
>> Correct!

If the profit will be recovered, all problems will be solved naturally, I am sure.
>> If the profit will recover, all problems will be solved naturally, I am sure.

As for my assignment, yes, I joined several singing competitions long times ago.
>> As for my assignment, yes, I joined several singing competitions a long time ago.

I won the first on a small contest.
>> Correct!
Or: I won the first place in a small contest.

Despite it was a small size and had a low level typically, I was so happy for it.
>> Despite it being a small size and had a low level, typically, I was so happy for it.

As I told you, I will sing and playing the guitar outside someday.
>>  As I told you, I will sing and play the guitar outside someday.

I enjoy doing something in front of many people.
>> Correct!

I think I was born to be a person like that.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130845 5 ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-09-07 1776
130844 What are the effects of knowing astronomy to humans? °­*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-07 0
130843 human right ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-07 1234
130842 WRITING TASK: Do you think there is a way to be always prepared... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-07 5
130841 questions) È«*Ç¥ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-07 942
130840 If you wrote a letter to your government, what would you write... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-07 1
130839 9/6 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-07 1282
130838 What\'s a life experience you\'re looking forward to in the... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-09-07 1231
130837 How do you stay motivated and passionate about your career over... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-07 1
130836 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 1280
130835 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 1830
130834 Where are some good places to meet people? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 1
130833 Homework-230906 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 2
130832 Homework Àü*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 3
130831 Writing ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 1360
130830 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 1221
130829 4 ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 2329
130828 Homework ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 1414
130827 homework 09.06 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 1860
130826 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04