¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 12.07

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-12-07 1292

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Are online deliveries making us lazier?

Actually I think it's true that we are became lazier because of online deliveries.
In the old days, we had to go directly to the place if we wanted to buy things or eat food.
On the other hand, these days, we can easily order and easily get at anywhere.
Except that we became lazy, I think online deliveries has other advantages.
Before the online shopping became active, the prices were wrong for each store.
Sometimes bad stores were ripped off or forced to sell, regardless of my opinion.
But, these days online shopping malls have well developed.
So, many bad practices disappeared in direct shopping.
In my point of view, it's another advantage of online delivery service.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Are online deliveries making us lazier?

Actually I think it's true that we are became lazier because of online deliveries.
>> Actually I think it's true that we are becoming lazier because of online deliveries.
In the old days, we had to go directly to the place if we wanted to buy things or eat food.
>> CORRECT!
On the other hand, these days, we can easily order and easily get at anywhere.
>> On the other hand, these days, we can easily order and easily get it anywhere.
Except that we became lazy, I think online deliveries has other advantages.
>> CORRECT!
Before the online shopping became active, the prices were wrong for each store.
>> Before online shopping became active, the prices were wrong for each store.
Sometimes bad stores were ripped off or forced to sell, regardless of my opinion.
>> CORRECT!
But, these days online shopping malls have well developed.
>> But, these days online shopping malls have been well-developed.
So, many bad practices disappeared in direct shopping.
>> CORRECT!
In my point of view, it's another advantage of online delivery service.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133801 Why do some people fear death? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-11 946
133800 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 1052
133799 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 2
133798 Homework °­*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 1412
133797 homework 01.10 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 1897
133796 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 414
133795 1/8 homework Á¶*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 0
133794 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 2177
133793 Which mode of transportation do you think is the safest? How... ÇÏ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 1
133792 Homework °ø*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 1106
133791 In your opinion, what does \"stand tall\" mean? ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 1102
133790 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 969
133789 Have you ever tried listening to foreign language music? How do... ÇÏ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 1
133788 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 1413
133787 What famous foods from other countries would you like to try?... ÇÏ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 1
133786 Do people use cosmetics because they lack confidence? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 1
133785 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is it important... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 1
133784 Who is your real life superhero? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 944
133783 Why do many people from different parts of the world want to... ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 1325
133782 What do you think are the qualities of being a good leader? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-01-10 938

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04