¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 12.07

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-12-07 668

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Are online deliveries making us lazier?

Actually I think it's true that we are became lazier because of online deliveries.
In the old days, we had to go directly to the place if we wanted to buy things or eat food.
On the other hand, these days, we can easily order and easily get at anywhere.
Except that we became lazy, I think online deliveries has other advantages.
Before the online shopping became active, the prices were wrong for each store.
Sometimes bad stores were ripped off or forced to sell, regardless of my opinion.
But, these days online shopping malls have well developed.
So, many bad practices disappeared in direct shopping.
In my point of view, it's another advantage of online delivery service.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Are online deliveries making us lazier?

Actually I think it's true that we are became lazier because of online deliveries.
>> Actually I think it's true that we are becoming lazier because of online deliveries.
In the old days, we had to go directly to the place if we wanted to buy things or eat food.
>> CORRECT!
On the other hand, these days, we can easily order and easily get at anywhere.
>> On the other hand, these days, we can easily order and easily get it anywhere.
Except that we became lazy, I think online deliveries has other advantages.
>> CORRECT!
Before the online shopping became active, the prices were wrong for each store.
>> Before online shopping became active, the prices were wrong for each store.
Sometimes bad stores were ripped off or forced to sell, regardless of my opinion.
>> CORRECT!
But, these days online shopping malls have well developed.
>> But, these days online shopping malls have been well-developed.
So, many bad practices disappeared in direct shopping.
>> CORRECT!
In my point of view, it's another advantage of online delivery service.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135675 country that I want to visit and why ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-20 682
135674 How can a greeting suggest your relationship with other people? ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 3
135673 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 614
135672 question and homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 696
135671 homework 03.19 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 538
135670 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 866
135669 What is your fashion sense? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 1
135668 Who is the tallest in the world? Write something about that... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 705
135667 Imagine you could create your perfect Monday. What would it look... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 456
135666 Where are you going on a trip next time? Why do you want to go... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 557
135665 How does education help make things fair for everyone, including... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 845
135664 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 737
135663 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 1
135662 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 695
135661 What does success mean to you, and how do you plan to reach it? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 1329
135660 What are the thing you want to do while you still can? Explain... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 0
135659 Taking a nap ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 677
135658 Why do many people from different parts of the world want to... ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 663
135657 If you could create your perfect weekend. How would you spend... ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 807
135656 What is your favorite hobby, and why do you enjoy it? Describe... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04