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If you could spend Christmas anywhere in the world, where would it be, and what activities would you

작성자: 이*윤
2023-12-02 739

회원님의 영작문

I'm thinking of two place if I could spend Christmas anywhere in the world, but it's a opposite place.
I love snow very much.
However, it's rare to see snow because I live in a warmer place than other cities.
I've been dreaming of a white Christmas since I was young.
So, I want to spend Christmas in a place where it snows a lot.
Particularly, I'm thinking of Finland, and Finland is a Nordic country, so it's known that there are many snow and Santa was born, I really want to go and enjoy it because there are many fun festivals on Christmas.
On the contrary, I also think that I want to meet children in developing countries.
Most developing countries are hot African countries, so I can't see snow as I dream, but I want to make a happy Christmas by giving gifts or helping children who don't know Christmas.
Christmas is a fun day for all children and a day that everyone deserves to have enjoy.
I hope this Christmas is a Christmas where everyone in the world is happy.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

A good Monday, Yun. Your Christmas ideas are so touching and thoughtful! It's awesome how you dream of snowy adventures in Finland and also want to make a difference by spreading joy to kids in developing countries. Your big-hearted holiday spirit is really wonderful. Stay who you are, Yun. People like you are kind of rare nowadays. Have a nice day ahead! <3
~T. Jade^^
Homework: If you could spend Christmas anywhere in the world, where would it be, and what activities would you want to do?
I'm thinking of two place if I could spend Christmas anywhere in the world, but it's a opposite place.
>> I'm thinking of two places if I could spend Christmas anywhere in the world, but they are opposite places.
I love snow very much.
>> Correct
However, it's rare to see snow because I live in a warmer place than other cities.
>> Correct
I've been dreaming of a white Christmas since I was young.
>> Correct
So, I want to spend Christmas in a place where it snows a lot.
>> Correct
Particularly, I'm thinking of Finland, and Finland is a Nordic country, so it's known that there are many snow and Santa was born, I really want to go and enjoy it because there are many fun festivals on Christmas.
>> Particularly, I'm thinking of Finland. Finland is a Nordic country known for having a lot of snow and being the birthplace of Santa. I really want to go and enjoy it because there are many fun festivals during Christmas.
On the contrary, I also think that I want to meet children in developing countries.
>> Correct
>> OR: On the other hand, I also want to meet children in developing countries.
Most developing countries are hot African countries, so I can't see snow as I dream, but I want to make a happy Christmas by giving gifts or helping children who don't know Christmas.
>> Most developing countries are hot, like African countries, so I can't see snow as I dream. But I want to make a happy Christmas by giving gifts or helping children who don't know about Christmas.
Christmas is a fun day for all children and a day that everyone deserves to have enjoy.
>> Christmas is a fun day for all children and a day that everyone deserves to enjoy.
I hope this Christmas is a Christmas where everyone in the world is happy.
>> Correct
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