¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 11.30

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-11-30 823

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why are some people not interested in sports?

These days, many people who have hobbies.
For example, there are many kinds of exercise, watching movies, reading books or make a DIY
Anyway, I think one of the reason some people not interested in sports is that they are doing different hobbies or don't have enough time for hobby.
Actually, many modern people think they don't have enough time to do on hobby even if they have a hobby.
So, instead of spending time sports, I think they spending time in other hobbies.
Exercise can give our body health and positive things.
But this hobby requires more time investment than other hobbies.
That's why I think some people are not have interested in to do sports.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why are some people not interested in sports?


These days, many people who have hobbies.
>> These days, many people find their own hobbies.
For example, there are many kinds of exercise, watching movies, reading books or make a DIY
>> For example, they do exercise, watch movies, read books, or make a DIY project.
Anyway, I think one of the reason some people not interested in sports is that they are doing different hobbies or don't have enough time for hobby.
>> Anyway, I think one of the reasons why some people are not interested in sports is that they are doing different hobbies or they don't have enough time for their hobbies.
Actually, many modern people think they don't have enough time to do on hobby even if they have a hobby.
>> Actually, many people nowadays think they don't have enough time to do their hobbies even if they have a hobby.
So, instead of spending time sports, I think they spending time in other hobbies.
>> So, instead of spending time on sports, I think they spending time in other hobbies.
Exercise can give our body health and positive things.
>> Exercising can make our body healthy and give a lot of positive things.
But this hobby requires more time investment than other hobbies.
>> But this hobby requires more time to invest than other hobbies.
That's why I think some people are not have interested in to do sports.
>> That's why I think some people are not interested in doing sports.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133553 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-01 153
133552 Apologies ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-01 3
133551 Gadgets ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-01 2
133550 Job ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-01 3
133549 What¡¯s the latest news? ±Ç*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-31 1
133548 What are your thoughts on Memorial Day as a holiday? Is this... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-31 2
133547 My New Year\\\'s Resolution ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-31 3
133546 What are you grateful for this year? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-31 0
133545 HOMEWORK FOR 12.29.2023 WRITING TASK: Do you like stretching?... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-31 3
133544 HOMEWORK FOR 12.28.2023 WRITING TASK: What don\'t you like about... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-31 5
133543 homework ¹Ú*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-12-30 412
133542 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is it important... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-12-30 0
133541 How do you celebrate the New Year in your country? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-30 0
133540 Are there any specific activities or events in your community... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-12-30 733
133539 What are the benefits of having constant communication with your... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 354
133538 Homework ±è*´ã ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 803
133537 What¡¯s better to have, great imagination or lots of knowledge? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 0
133536 homework 12.29 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 355
133535 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 565
133534 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-29 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04