¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 11.29

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-11-29 791

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the pros and cons of eating raw food?

There are many kinds of raw food today.
For example, there are kinds of fish dishes, seafood, salads, fruits, and nuts.
I think the pros of raw food is that it has a delicious texture.
Because we can feel the fresh texture than grilled or boiled cook.
And there are nutrients that can be get when eaten only raw.
But we have to be careful of the raw food.
The beggiest disadvantage of raw food is food poisoning.
So, when we eaten raw fish or food we have to as soon as possible to be eat.
Next, some types of fish have parasites.
So, If some people worried about parasites, I recommend boiled or baked food.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the pros and cons of eating raw food?


There are many kinds of raw food today.
>> CORRECT!
For example, there are kinds of fish dishes, seafood, salads, fruits, and nuts.
>> CORRECT!
I think the pros of raw food is that it has a delicious texture.
>> CORRECT!
Because we can feel the fresh texture than grilled or boiled cook.
>> It's because we can feel the fresh texture than grilled or well-cooked.
And there are nutrients that can be get when eaten only raw.
>> And there are nutrients that we can get from eating raw food.
But we have to be careful of the raw food.
>> But we have to be careful with eating raw food.
The beggiest disadvantage of raw food is food poisoning.
>> The biggest disadvantage of raw food is food poisoning.
So, when we eaten raw fish or food we have to as soon as possible to be eat.
>> So, when we eaten raw fish or food, we have to eat it as soon as possible.
OR >> So, when we eaten raw fish or food, we have to eat it right away.
Next, some types of fish have parasites.
>> CORRECT!
So, If some people worried about parasites, I recommend boiled or baked food.
>> So, if some people are worried about parasites, I recommend boiled or baked food.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131322 What\'s your thought on a small city or small province wanting... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 1
131321 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 343
131320 To release my stress ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 259
131319 Which friend makes you laugh a lot? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 313
131318 What are the things that you are extremely proud of as a parent? Á¤*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 345
131317 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 1
131316 Are you happy to be living in the ¡®Information Age¡¯? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 0
131315 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 2
131314 today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 393
131313 What is the most environmentally friendly form of transportation? Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 0
131312 Homework Á¤*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 0
131311 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°The... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 0
131310 Homework Á¤*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 0
131309 Best time to visit my place ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 461
131308 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 515
131307 HOMEWORK-230926 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 2
131306 How would you describe your English communication skills? Á¶*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 1
131305 natural disasters ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 253
131304 The advantage of living in the countryside ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 795
131303 . ¼Û*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-26 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04