¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 11.29

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-11-29 833

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the pros and cons of eating raw food?

There are many kinds of raw food today.
For example, there are kinds of fish dishes, seafood, salads, fruits, and nuts.
I think the pros of raw food is that it has a delicious texture.
Because we can feel the fresh texture than grilled or boiled cook.
And there are nutrients that can be get when eaten only raw.
But we have to be careful of the raw food.
The beggiest disadvantage of raw food is food poisoning.
So, when we eaten raw fish or food we have to as soon as possible to be eat.
Next, some types of fish have parasites.
So, If some people worried about parasites, I recommend boiled or baked food.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the pros and cons of eating raw food?


There are many kinds of raw food today.
>> CORRECT!
For example, there are kinds of fish dishes, seafood, salads, fruits, and nuts.
>> CORRECT!
I think the pros of raw food is that it has a delicious texture.
>> CORRECT!
Because we can feel the fresh texture than grilled or boiled cook.
>> It's because we can feel the fresh texture than grilled or well-cooked.
And there are nutrients that can be get when eaten only raw.
>> And there are nutrients that we can get from eating raw food.
But we have to be careful of the raw food.
>> But we have to be careful with eating raw food.
The beggiest disadvantage of raw food is food poisoning.
>> The biggest disadvantage of raw food is food poisoning.
So, when we eaten raw fish or food we have to as soon as possible to be eat.
>> So, when we eaten raw fish or food, we have to eat it as soon as possible.
OR >> So, when we eaten raw fish or food, we have to eat it right away.
Next, some types of fish have parasites.
>> CORRECT!
So, If some people worried about parasites, I recommend boiled or baked food.
>> So, if some people are worried about parasites, I recommend boiled or baked food.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135020 Who pays ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-27 258
135019 Can you tell me a little bit about the history of your hometown? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-02-27 3
135018 How good are you at playing sports? How could you be better? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 451
135017 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 581
135016 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 509
135015 Traveling to new places open people\'s minds to new ideas. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 745
135014 Discuss the importance of kindness in daily life. ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 419
135013 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 583
135012 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 504
135011 Good and bad things about me ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 790
135010 Homework ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 924
135009 homework ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 0
135008 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 2
135007 homework 02.26 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 808
135006 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 6
135005 Do you prefer to travel alone or with others? Why? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 668
135004 How important do you think to greet someone properly? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 803
135003 Are you afraid of heights? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 884
135002 I think it\'s better to use words rather than slang À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 796
135001 whice one ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-26 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04