¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What kind of world do you think would be this if people never went to school?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-11-23 1624

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Something from which people can learn, such as schools could mean that there is no share and progress in knowledge or technology. Without knowledge accumulated incessantly, humanity could end up living primitive lives. I can¡¯t attribute human evolution and development in knowledge only to schools, of which contribution we can¡¯t underestimate to what people have achieved so far.

If we don't have a public school system, people would have to settle for a private tutoring system, which had been cherished by the rich. This signifies that people have a pent-up desire to have their children better off than them. To recap, public education systems, such as schools will see a drastic gap in knowledge accumulation by families or countries and experience downward standardization of education.

I'd like to tell my son who doesn't like school about the virtues of schools that he has had benefits. I would make it clear to him that school is the blessing that some other people have longed for.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Steve! Keep up your consistency in completing your homework every day. Great job! In terms of grammar, your sentences are correct. I've sent revised sentences for your reference, focusing on clarity and punctuation.
Sincerely,
^^ T. Ara

Something from which people can learn, such as schools could mean that there is no share and progress in knowledge or technology. 
>>> Something from which people can learn, such as schools, could mean that there is no sharing and progress in knowledge or technology.
Without knowledge accumulated incessantly, humanity could end up living primitive lives. 
>>> CORRECT!!
I can¡¯t attribute human evolution and development in knowledge only to schools, of which contribution we can¡¯t underestimate to what people have achieved so far.
>>> CORRECT!!
OR >>> I can't attribute human evolution and the development of knowledge solely to schools, the contribution of which we cannot underestimate in what people have achieved so far.
If we don't have a public school system, people would have to settle for a private tutoring system, which had been cherished by the rich. 
>>> CORRECT!!
This signifies that people have a pent-up desire to have their children better off than them. 
>>> CORRECT!!
OR >>> This signifies that people have a pent-up desire to see their children better off than themselves.
To recap, public education systems, such as schools will see a drastic gap in knowledge accumulation by families or countries and experience downward standardization of education.
>>> CORRECT!!
I'd like to tell my son who doesn't like school about the virtues of schools that he has had benefits. 
>>> CORRECT!!
OR >>> I'd like to tell my son, who doesn't like school, about the virtues of schools from which he has benefited.
I would make it clear to him that school is the blessing that some other people have longed for.
>>> CORRECT!!
OR >>> I would make it clear to him that school is a blessing that some other people have longed for.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130450 What is the biggest change you\'d like to make to your life? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 1176
130449 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 1983
130448 What\'s the most difficult exam you\'ve ever taken? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 1
130447 Answer the following in full setences. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 2146
130446 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-08-24 2207
130445 Which types of people suffer the least discrimination? Are you... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2
130444 How do I know if I have difficulty concentrating? ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 0
130443 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 1552
130442 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 0
130441 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 1510
130440 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2839
130439 To Introduce traditional places in Korea. ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 1874
130438 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 0
130437 homework 08.23 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 1617
130436 Would you rather eat a banana or a carrot? Why? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 1357
130435 What are some acts of care that have a positive impact on the... Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 1161
130434 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 4
130433 Would you rather ride a bicycle or go roller skating? Why? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 1838
130432 I think it\'s almost impossible for human rights are protected. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 2367
130431 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-23 1689

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04