¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-11-22 722

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello.
Today is more hectic.
I may have felt this way because I ate a lunch alone.
I always need an energy from my people.
I received the result of blood test, and I found that my HbA1c became normal but my wife's HbA1c got worse.
In addition, my wife's iron level got worse.
Since I am worried about my wife's health, I proposed her to take some nutritional supplement including iron, and she accepted it.
To lower her blood glucose, we better stop eating carbohydrate like bread, noodle, and snack.
How can we be happy without those food?
Regarding my homework, I have an experience that I was bullied.
When I was in middle school, many friends were jealous of me because I got high sores in all exams.
As a matter of fact, I was somewhat confident excessively, and it could be another reason.
One day, some of them who were my closest friends showed me the hostility, and it made me sad.
I am not sure I can say that this happening was being bullied.
Now I should get going to my wife.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Dr. Kim!

I know a man who is the happiest when your clinic is busy as a bee. His name is Dr. MJ. I am sure that he checked on everyone today especially the revenue. I am so happy for all of you and your achievements! 

It is unfortunate that your wife's HbA1c result got worse. Perhaps she may be stress eating when she is tired. They lack of iron means blood lacks adequate healthy red blood cells which may result to anemia. Taking supplements is indeed a good idea. Meanwhile life without carbohydrates means that you have to eat more vegetables and meat. I am sure you can all manage to do this. However, Korean sticky rice is just irresistible. 

Being bullied means having the intention of harming someone. If your classmates were ridiculing you before of being smart, that is considered bullying. It was not right. You see, some not so smart classmates think that you are the villain for getting good scores while they have low ones. Of course this is not your fault but they blame you because you score higher. Truly, the bullies have a crooked thought about the world and so they take it on someone.

Below, I made some minor grammar suggestions. Read them carefully. Thank you for writing an interesting and informative composition of your daily life and homework answer. It is much appreciated.

See you!

-T. Donna~

Hello.
>> Correct!

Today is more hectic.
>> Correct!

I may have felt this way because I ate a lunch alone.
>> I may have felt this way because I ate lunch alone. Very good expression!

I always need an energy from my people.
>> Correct!
Or: 
I always need energy from my people.

I received the result of blood test, and I found that my HbA1c became normal but my wife's HbA1c got worse.
>> I received the result of blood test, and I found out that my HbA1c became normal but my wife's HbA1c got worse.

In addition, my wife's iron level got worse.
>> Correct!

Since I am worried about my wife's health, I proposed her to take some nutritional supplement including iron, and she accepted it.
>> Since I am worried about my wife's health, I proposed to her to take some nutritional supplements including iron, and she accepted it.

To lower her blood glucose, we better stop eating carbohydrate like bread, noodle, and snack.
>> Correct!
Or: To lower her blood glucose, we better stop eating carbohydrates like bread, noodles, and snacks.

How can we be happy without those food?
>> Correct!

Regarding my homework, I have an experience that I was bullied.
>> Correct!

When I was in middle school, many friends were jealous of me because I got high sores in all exams.
>> Correct!

As a matter of fact, I was somewhat confident excessively, and it could be another reason.
>> Correct!

One day, some of them who were my closest friends showed me the hostility, and it made me sad.
>> Correct! Great sentence!

I am not sure I can say that this happening was being bullied.
>> I am not sure if I can say that this happening was being bullied.

Now I should get going to my wife.
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135404 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 683
135403 Do you think teachers should be strict sometimes? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 884
135402 Should we always do our best in everything that we do? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 548
135401 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Would you... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 3
135400 How does facing and overcoming fears help people grow as... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 1
135399 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 0
135398 What stories have you read or heard recently about the... ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 738
135397 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 1
135396 What is your all-time favorite dish, and why? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 700
135395 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 720
135394 A million dollars ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 384
135393 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 693
135392 My Three Thing To Achieve ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 752
135391 >> How does the weather affect your mood? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 502
135390 >> What are your thoughts on your school class schedule? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 0
135389 What musical insterments do you play? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 677
135388 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 1
135387 How do you feel if you forget your mobile phone and leave it... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 664
135386 pregnancy ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 1
135385 What are the things you provide for your loved ones? ±Ç*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-11 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04