¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Hardest working out

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*ȯ
2023-11-20 2200

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I joined the marathon first time last year It was the hardest working out ever. It was summer and I have ran only 5 km. However I joined 10 km marathon. There were so many hills. I am not sure If I joined that marathon just now It would be easy.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Thomas! 

Running needs some good training and technique to beat the time that you want to clock in. Of course, you want to be better than your last performance so you have to be on great condition physically and mentally as you run many kilometers.

Since I have never ran a marathon, I guess the degree of difficultly is tremendous and I might roll over the side of the street after just running a kilometer.

You have written a very good composition, keep it up! Study my suggestions below.

See you on Wednesday. 

-T. Donna~

When I joined the marathon first time last year It was the hardest working out ever. 
>> When I joined the marathon first time last year it was the hardest work out ever. 

It was summer and I have ran only 5 km. However I joined 10 km marathon. 
>> It was summer and I have ran only 5 kms. However, I joined the10 km marathon. 

There were so many hills. 
>> Correct!

I am not sure If I joined that marathon just now It would be easy.
>>  I am not sure if I joined that marathon now maybe it would be easier.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130746 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1252
130745 Would you rather be able to teleport or read minds? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 888
130744 Do you think scientists will produce a mechanical heart one day... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 4
130743 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 0
130742 I want durian ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 954
130741 Choose the company\'s growth and success. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1773
130740 Have you ever seen a real gun? ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 5
130739 HOMEWORK-230904 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 2
130738 Are policemen powerful in your country? Why or why not? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1842
130737 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"If I become a... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 4
130736 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1232
130735 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1633
130734 2 ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1299
130733 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1184
130732 Homework-which greeting kind of annoys you? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 787
130731 How do you calm yourself in stressful situations? ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 3
130730 WRITING TASK: What can you do for your mother? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 4
130729 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1300
130728 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1404
130727 Avoiding and choosing the group ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1187

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04