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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Homework

작성자: 김*우
2023-11-17 997

회원님의 영작문

Hi.
It was snowy for a while.
That was the first snow this year.
When the snow falls and stacks enough, I'll take the photo and send it to you.
Snow always makes my heart pumping.
Of course, I should worry about driving simultaneously.
Fortunately, it seems that snow is finished completely this time.
Today is our 11th wedding anniversary.
I prepared the bundle of flower this morning through the Coupang delivery.
What a convenient world!
My wife looked so happy because of flower.
Since we drank last night, we won't drink tonight.
Instead, we will consider the sumptuous food delivery this evening.
Although I didn't see many patient, the profit seems to be not bad.
Maybe, Dr. MJ worked so hard.
To celebrate our anniversary, I ordered pretty fishes which are supposed to live in my fish tank.
I am looking forward to receiving those fishes.
Regarding my homework, I really want my kids not to be a working students.
I think that students should focus on their learning for their better future.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi there again, Dr. Kim!

What a lovely day! I also saw the snow fall in Seoul with my other student today! I wonder how high they stack on the ground for you to send me the photo when you can. I guess, unlike New York or Canada, yours is relatively less than these places. Nonetheless, snowfall is romantic and fascinating. I hope I can see some real snowfall soon. Then, pay careful attention on the road while driving and expect for more snow to fall soon.

Happy anniversary to you and your wife! Receiving a bunch of flowers in the morning is one of the best things that you can do for a starter. I am sure your wife was all smiles like she is in cloud nine. It is not everyday that she gets flowers and this day is extra special. Thanks to your effort and the help of Coupang!

As you have some hearty meal tonight, you can reckon on the love that you started 11 years ago even when you did not have kids yet. Celebrating your anniversary can make you look back on fond memories and remind each other how far you have come from the day you first met.

In your clinic meanwhile, let Dr. MJ do his thing. ^^ Everything is going to be alright. 

Finally, if you will retire early, your kids may need to work since they are three and there needs to be more financial support for all of them. I am sure you have these covered.

Now, please read my suggestions carefully. Your homework answer and composition gets better and better over time. Hence, well done once again!

See you next week!

-T. Donna~

Hi.
>> Correct!

It was snowy for a while.
>> Correct!

That was the first snow this year.
>> Correct!

When the snow falls and stacks enough, I'll take the photo and send it to you.
>> Correct!

Snow always makes my heart pumping.
>> Correct!

Of course, I should worry about driving simultaneously.
>> Correct!
Or: Of course, I should worry about driving and snowing simultaneously.

Fortunately, it seems that snow is finished completely this time.
>>  Fortunately, it seems that the snow is finished completely by this time.

Today is our 11th wedding anniversary.
>> Correct!

I prepared the bundle of flower this morning through the Coupang delivery.
>> I prepared a bundle of flowers this morning through the Coupang delivery.

What a convenient world!
>> Correct!

My wife looked so happy because of flower.
>>My wife looked so happy because of the flower.

Since we drank last night, we won't drink tonight.
>> Correct!

Instead, we will consider the sumptuous food delivery this evening.
>> Correct!

Although I didn't see many patient, the profit seems to be not bad.
>> Although I didn't see many patients, the profit seems not to be bad.

Maybe, Dr. MJ worked so hard.
>> Correct!

To celebrate our anniversary, I ordered pretty fishes which are supposed to live in my fish tank.
>> Correct!

I am looking forward to receiving those fishes.
>> Correct!

Regarding my homework, I really want my kids not to be a working students.
>> Regarding my homework, I don't really want my kids  to be working students.

I think that students should focus on their learning for their better future.
>> Correct!

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02
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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
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이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
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