¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 11.16

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-11-16 991

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the biggest problems with living in cities?

One of the big reasons for living in city is convenience.
This is because of the transportation, cultural life, and convenience facilities located in city.
But, these days problems with living in cities is housing supply problem.
Many office workers prefer their companies located in Seoul.
And people who lived in the country side or living in cities people want to work in Seoul.
So, many office workers gather and want to live in Seoul.
However, there are It's hard to find the house they want.
In addition, young people want to leave country side and want live in Seoul.
So the problem is getting bad.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the biggest problems with living in cities?


One of the big reasons for living in city is convenience.
>> One of the big reasons for living in the city is convenience.
This is because of the transportation, cultural life, and convenience facilities located in city.
>> This is because of the transportation, cultural life, and convenient facilities located in city.
But, these days problems with living in cities is housing supply problem.
>> But, the problem these days about living in cities is the lack of homes.
Many office workers prefer their companies located in Seoul.
>> Many office workers prefer their companies be located in Seoul.
And people who lived in the country side or living in cities people want to work in Seoul.
>> And people who both live in the countryside or in cities want to work in Seoul.
So, many office workers gather and want to live in Seoul.
>> CORRECT!
However, there are It's hard to find the house they want.
>> However, it's hard to find the house they want.
In addition, young people want to leave country side and want live in Seoul.
>> In addition, young people want to leave the countryside and want to live in Seoul.
So the problem is getting bad.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131688 What\'s your thought on the article, in particular, the man... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 1
131687 What three things can you do today to help nature? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 1
131686 My future house ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 1035
131685 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 0
131684 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 0
131683 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 1000
131682 WRITING TASK: How can we maintain our healthy routine? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 5
131681 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°Do you want to... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 2
131680 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 770
131679 homework ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 894
131678 What daily activities help you to be creative? ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 855
131677 How do you handle a situation when someone\'s lame excuse can be... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 636
131676 What are the usual excuses you made when you were a student and... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 777
131675 Is it important to adjust to another person\'s personality? Why... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 812
131674 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 597
131673 What country do you want to live when your retire? ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 2
131672 Atheism and agnosticism are increasingly popular. Why is this? ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 621
131671 The most attractive thing in Daegwallyeong ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 892
131670 HOMEWORK ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 623
131669 HOMEWORK ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-16 483

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04