¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 11.14

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-11-14 2543

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Can snow be dangerous?

When it snows, I feel that start the real winter season.
But, if it snows too much, there are many dangerous things.
I think the first of them is a green(plastic) house.
Many farmers using greenhouses to grow the fruits and the vegetables in winter.
However, if there are stack too much snow, the snow will destroy the greenhouse.
Similarly, the weak roofs houses can collapse because snow.
Next, the road freezes.
If we don\'t remove the snow on the road, the road becomes icy like an ice skating rink.
So many car can't move, or many people slip and get hurt.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Can snow be dangerous?


When it snows, I feel that start the real winter season.
>> When it snows, I feel that it's already the start of the real winter season.
But, if it snows too much, there are many dangerous things.
>> CORRECT!
I think the first of them is a green(plastic) house.
>> I think the first of them is the green (plastic) house.
Many farmers using greenhouses to grow the fruits and the vegetables in winter.
>> Many farmers use greenhouses to grow the fruits and the vegetables in winter.
However, if there are stack too much snow, the snow will destroy the greenhouse.
>> However, if there is a big stack of snow, the snow will destroy the greenhouse.
Similarly, the weak roofs houses can collapse because snow.
>> Similarly, the weak houses' roofs can collapse because of the snow.
Next, the road freezes.
>> Next are the frozen roads.
If we don\'t remove the snow on the road, the road becomes icy like an ice skating rink.
>> If we don't remove the snow on the road, the road becomes icy like an ice skating rink.
So many car can't move, or many people slip and get hurt.
>> So many cars can't move, or many people slip and get hurt.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129506 What are you really good at doing? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 3395
129505 How can daily life support services positively impact the... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 3563
129504 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2569
129503 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1963
129502 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 0
129501 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1637
129500 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 0
129499 HOMEWORK FOR 06/23 How important is it to wear a facemask when... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 6
129498 Diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 0
129497 What crimes do you think will increase in the future? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 0
129496 trend ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 1
129495 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 0
129494 meet the new person. ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2893
129493 What Korean food would you like recommend and why? ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2431
129492 How would you describe a perfect weekend? ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 3710
129491 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 3224
129490 The biggest choice in my life! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2448
129489 Home work ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2705
129488 homework 07.13 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2154
129487 Day2 ½Å*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-13 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04